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Old 31-10-2008, 10:22 PM   #1
ehast13
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Default worst week of my life

Just had the worst week ever.

Last thursday my wife took our ten week old son to the doctor. He had a chesty cough and we thought we should get it checked out (he was premmy and is still only 8 pound). The doc advised we take him to the hospital.

The hospital did some xrays and advised us that he had broken ribs and arms. The police arrived soon after. We were both questioned at the station and by early hours of friday morning both our kids (newbron and two year old daughter) were removed by Child Safety and put in foster care.

The police and DCS were very forceful. They wanted to know what happened. Both my wife and I had no idea. I knew it wasn't me but.....surely my wife wouldn't do this...would she?

I was questioned again.. This time advised that I or my wife would most likely be charged with grevious bodily harm.

By this stage I couldn't even look at my wife. I knew it had to be her. She had post natal a while back so it was possible she just snapped.

The cops wanted me to tell them what I suspected. I remained silent becasuse it just didn't seem right.

By Tuesday afternoon, we had had to sign so many forms allowing xrays, MRI's and CT scans. This time they wanted to perform a nuclear Bone Injection.

I put my foot down and said NO. While They told me what a bad father I was for not allowing this, my wife just cried. I couldn't understand how this procedure could help him. He had already been released from hospital on friday night into foster care!

We continued to refuse until we got a phone call from the Director or DCS. SHe wanted to speak to us. It was about 5.30 pm on Tuesday arvo.

She said "It would appear that the hospital has made an error with the original xrays. YOur son is fine other than some mucosal thickening (bronchiolotis) in his respiratory tract. YOu can pick them up as soon as you want"

I swore.

I swore again but remained calm.

We picked up the kids and The director of the hospital called us to tell us that they knew on FRIDAY that he was fine but thought they had better get their 'expert' to have a look. He was on leave and they had to wait until Tuesday ARVO!"

We have an appt to see the director on Wednesday.

I never thought this sort of could happen to us. We are a middle aged, middle income family with no crimimal history. A bit of post natal was all that could be found...

What I want to know is - Did some other poor little baby have to go home with abusive carers because they mixed up his xrays? Was he diagnosed with a chest infection and sent home with broken bones?

Who had my kids? How where they treated?

Will I be reimbursed for the unpaid leave I had to take becasue police wouldn't release me early enough to get to work?

My kids are young enough to forget this. My wife and I will never forget. We both thought each other was guilty. I really despised her for a few days and she probably despised me.

SHould we sue? Should we just let it go and move on?

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Old 31-10-2008, 10:26 PM   #2
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That's atrocious and while cops would probably see this sort of thing all the time and treat the offenders like the dirt they are, to be treated in such a manner when there is a mistake is plain wrong. Personally I'd be demanding answers to your questions and look at media etc if you don't get anywhere.
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:26 PM   #3
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OMG dude, thats horrible. I'd be speaking to my lawyer if I were you!

At least everythings back to normal, but will deffinatly put strain on your marrige. Just um, don't tell your wife you thought she was guilty :(
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:35 PM   #4
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I must admit after reading your story all I could think of was what has happened to the little one that possibly has broken bones and sent home??
Or did they completely misinterpret the x-rays (strange but then stranger things have happened).
Then my thoughts were to you and your wife. I really don't know how I would feel if it happened to me and can only imagine how you guys are going to get through all this and stay strong.

I most certainly am not one to say sue normally but omg, these people need to get this stuff right not just wing it and possibly ruin a happy families life (accusations have a way of causing doubts, arguments then separation :( ), go see a lawyer.

I really hope you guys do stay strong and work as a team and get the answers needed.

Good luck
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:32 PM   #5
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Thats not good, My wife and I just read this, They are the criminals, not you or you partner... I would be standing up and requesting reimbursment as a minimum, to sue proberly wouldnt be a bad idea. How people can stuff up and say nothing is beyond me...

Really sorry to hear this and hope all is well with you family.

Cheers Dan

P.S. what ever happend to innocent untill proven guilty????
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:32 PM   #6
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Yeah. I won't tell her but I think she knows just as I know she must have suspected me.

Is it wrong of me to want money??

I want to go public and screw them!

I want money put in a trust for my kids. It doesn't have to be much. Just to show my familiy that they are sorry and are taking responsibilty for this.

GOD! I am so angry about this. The relief part is over and now I am just being eaten up inside by this 'knotted up' feeling in my chest.

I like to think that I am a decent guy who has learned to let things go. Y'know "alls well that ends well" sort of thing but I am having trouble getting over this
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:40 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ehast13
Yeah. I won't tell her but I think she knows just as I know she must have suspected me.

Is it wrong of me to want money??

I want to go public and screw them!

I want money put in a trust for my kids. It doesn't have to be much. Just to show my familiy that they are sorry and are taking responsibilty for this.

GOD! I am so angry about this. The relief part is over and now I am just being eaten up inside by this 'knotted up' feeling in my chest.

I like to think that I am a decent guy who has learned to let things go. Y'know "alls well that ends well" sort of thing but I am having trouble getting over this
I think the difference is that you dont sound like the sort of person who is wanting to sue just to get squillions of dollars. I would think that the reimbursement of costs incurred/time at work lost plus a bit extra to go into the trust fund would be a fair thing - as opposed to going public asking for $500k. If it were me though the one thing I would want above all is an answer to the questions you originally asked - who had your kids etc?
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:51 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ehast13
Yeah. I won't tell her but I think she knows just as I know she must have suspected me.

Is it wrong of me to want money??

I want to go public and screw them!

I want money put in a trust for my kids. It doesn't have to be much. Just to show my familiy that they are sorry and are taking responsibilty for this.

GOD! I am so angry about this. The relief part is over and now I am just being eaten up inside by this 'knotted up' feeling in my chest.

I like to think that I am a decent guy who has learned to let things go. Y'know "alls well that ends well" sort of thing but I am having trouble getting over this
You guys need to talk to each other and get this out in the open, or it may fester, even though there's not actually anything wrong (a bit like a splinter left in your finger). You need to do it in a way that leaves you both laughing and comfortable, not in a way that causes a fight. I'd say something like "I knew you couldn't have done that, but they had me thinking that you did, and I bet you were thinking the same about me."

Oh, and I'd go and see a lawyer as soon as you can - sue the Hospital for pain & suffering.
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Old 01-11-2008, 12:10 AM   #9
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Take no prisoners. Who do these mofos think they are?? Call today tonight or current affair. Affair their butts from here to China. Man giveit to em,,get compo so they know youve been there.Get a laywer. Scum bags
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Old 01-11-2008, 10:58 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ehast13
Is it wrong of me to want money??
No it is not. In the end if they are proven to have acted wrongly, money is the only punishment that can be given to them.

Nothing they do can reverse the terrible situation you have been through, money is the only effective apology that can be offered.

Good luck and be nice to your wife (what an awful situation).

Last edited by nuthin' fancy; 01-11-2008 at 10:59 AM. Reason: poor spelling
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Old 01-11-2008, 11:34 AM   #11
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Mate, both my and my fiancee's hearts go out to you. We don't have kids, but even the thought of it is horrible.

I would be going after them with guns blazing. Not only for your own sake, to get an apology and fair compensation. Im not talking about hundreds of thousands, just what you suggested (time off work, trust fund, etc).

But more importantly, there is obviously something wrong with the system. gtxb67, I understand where you are coming from, but stuff like this SHOULD NOT happen, full stop. They may be overworked (my fiancee works in a hospital, I know), short of resources or whatever, but that is still no excuse. What about the poor kid who does have broken ribs? What about the people in future that this could happen to?

If this is not investigated, it will not be properly fixed. Lessons need to be learnt from this, or else it could happen again. And unfortunatly the most effective way to get this to happen is the embarress them. For your sake, you should go speak to a lawyer about this. But I would love for something like this to go public to try and fix the root problem. As others have said, its not a DCS or police issue, they were fed the information and followed their own procedures, it is the fault of the hospital and the QLD health system as a whole.

Good luck, and I hope your family recovers from this shock as quickly as possible.
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Old 01-11-2008, 12:21 PM   #12
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Man what a horrible thing to have happen to you.
Both my wife and I feel for you at this time and wish you all the best.

My first concern would be to clear you and your wifes names and get both that and a written statement of accepted blame from DOCS and the Hospital.
Once I had that in my hot little hand I'd got for the throat.

Once again my family and I wish you all the best and hope that this nightmare goes quickly into the past.

Craig, Rebecca, Georgiana, Katie and Joshua
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Old 02-11-2008, 12:10 AM   #13
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Take a deep calming breath, get centered and write it all down NOW and consult with a lawyer. You can bet your that the police , the radiologists/hospital and DOCS are massaging CYA reports
as we speak.

Steve


Quote:
Originally Posted by ehast13
Yeah. I won't tell her but I think she knows just as I know she must have suspected me.

Is it wrong of me to want money??

I want to go public and screw them!

I want money put in a trust for my kids. It doesn't have to be much. Just to show my familiy that they are sorry and are taking responsibilty for this.

GOD! I am so angry about this. The relief part is over and now I am just being eaten up inside by this 'knotted up' feeling in my chest.

I like to think that I am a decent guy who has learned to let things go. Y'know "alls well that ends well" sort of thing but I am having trouble getting over this
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:44 PM   #14
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My wife and are a taking things a bit easier atm. We are both a bit damaged and I am just trying to keep my temper in check. I'm not mad with her. I'm just irritable. She has been nagging and yelling and carrying on, but I just bite my tongue and cuddle the kids a bit tighter (not too tight, tho! Don't want to break any ribs!).

We'll be okay. It is only 72 hours since we got the kids back.

It is just that I feel royally sodomized by people who discovered our innocence and sat on their error for another 4 days. While my kids where being cared for by who knows what (insensitive - probably awesome people who genuinely care for abused kids).

I don't ever recall wanting revenge like this.

I thought I was older and wiser than to seek vengence
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:02 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ehast13
My wife and are a taking things a bit easier atm. We are both a bit damaged and I am just trying to keep my temper in check. I'm not mad with her. I'm just irritable. She has been nagging and yelling and carrying on, but I just bite my tongue and cuddle the kids a bit tighter (not too tight, tho! Don't want to break any ribs!).

We'll be okay. It is only 72 hours since we got the kids back.

It is just that I feel royally sodomized by people who discovered our innocence and sat on their error for another 4 days. While my kids where being cared for by who knows what (insensitive - probably awesome people who genuinely care for abused kids).

I don't ever recall wanting revenge like this.

I thought I was older and wiser than to seek vengence
I wonder if they would permit you to speak with the people that had your children, just so you can put your mind at ease.
That is if you would want to speak with them even. I would be thinking they were very well looked after though.

Good on you for trying to be calm, I feel for you wife so much. It would rip me apart and I think her reaction is pretty much normal. In reality the anger and every other emotion you both might be feeling would be relatively normal and if directed to those that deserve it and not each other you will both definitely be the winners if you push for answers and compensation surely.
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:52 PM   #16
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I would suggest you get legal advice immdediatley and take your lawyer to the meeting with you.

PM Sent.
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:53 PM   #17
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thats so sad man, innocents get dragged through the coals and the filth still get away with it, take em for a ride man what they did was wrong.
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:55 PM   #18
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ehaust13 you really have been put through the ringer

what an emotional rollercoaster - can not even BEGIN to think about how harrowing a week you have had

definitely need to escalate - the friday till tuesday business is just unacceptable

good luck mate
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Old 31-10-2008, 10:57 PM   #19
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the health system did it again, yep i bet if you poped back in the same hospital they proberly wouldnt even remember who you were, they dont seem to care the health professionals and did emergancy even have a thought to ask you how could this happen first before they jump to conclusions, people always think the worse in people and it is wrong, see a lawer mate this is getting rediculious here is another scandal
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:22 PM   #20
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the health system did it again, yep i bet if you poped back in the same hospital they proberly wouldnt even remember who you were, they dont seem to care the health professionals and did emergancy even have a thought to ask you how could this happen first before they jump to conclusions, people always think the worse in people and it is wrong, see a lawer mate this is getting rediculious here is another scandal
You could seek legal advice and pursue legal action - then all you'd be doing is having them utilise their professional indemnity insurance to deal with your case (that's what they pay it for). They STILL wouldn't remember you..

..you want them never to forget you? Take this story to the media I say...

It's obvious that a catastrophic breakdown occurred in the hospital's protocols to let this happen to begin with (you'd think that the x-rays would be crosschecked by peer doctors, possibly followed by a physical examination of the child). To make matters worse the hospital WAITED on verifying their results, costing your family critical days of separation and utter anxiety..

Having a 9 month daughter myself I truly feel for your traumatic experience. Raise enough public awareness and your awful experience would hopefully act as a catalyst to prevent such gross failures of protocol from happening again..
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Old 02-11-2008, 12:14 AM   #21
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[QUOTE=Mansal]You could seek legal advice and pursue legal action - then all you'd be doing is having them utilise their professional indemnity insurance to deal with your case (that's what they pay it for). They STILL wouldn't remember you..

..you want them never to forget you? Take this story to the media I say...

It's obvious that a catastrophic breakdown occurred in the hospital's protocols to let this happen to begin with (you'd think that the x-rays would be crosschecked by peer doctors, possibly followed by a physical examination of the child).

Spot on..radiographs are but an AID to diagnosis
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:28 PM   #22
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As others have said, see a lawyer, even if its to find out what your rights are.
Sorry to hear mate that is a shocking thing to happen.
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:29 PM   #23
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Speechless..... Was there no apology or... hey we got it WRONG?
This is This Day Tonight or Current Affair, or even Slator & Gordon stuff.... People need to be held responsible here!
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:30 PM   #24
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mate legal action, do it, and do it soon.
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:32 PM   #25
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...just told the wife about your story (she works in the haematology lab of one of the major hospitals here in Melb)

Quote:
Originally Posted by ehast13
...I knew it wasn't me but.....surely my wife wouldn't do this...would she?
....
By this stage I couldn't even look at my wife. I knew it had to be her. She had post natal a while back so it was possible she just snapped.
....
The cops wanted me to tell them what I suspected. I remained silent becasuse it just didn't seem right.
....
...sounds to me like you were under duress being placed in such a stressful, confusing situation like this - you tend to start looking at everything with suspicion. Fortunately you went with your 'gut feeling' and didn't act on your so-called suspicion.
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:34 PM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ehast13
Just had the worst week ever.

Last thursday my wife took our ten week old son to the doctor. He had a chesty cough and we thought we should get it checked out (he was premmy and is still only 8 pound). The doc advised we take him to the hospital.

The hospital did some xrays and advised us that he had broken ribs and arms. The police arrived soon after. We were both questioned at the station and by early hours of friday morning both our kids (newbron and two year old daughter) were removed by Child Safety and put in foster care.

The police and DCS were very forceful. They wanted to know what happened. Both my wife and I had no idea. I knew it wasn't me but.....surely my wife wouldn't do this...would she?

I was questioned again.. This time advised that I or my wife would most likely be charged with grevious bodily harm.

By this stage I couldn't even look at my wife. I knew it had to be her. She had post natal a while back so it was possible she just snapped.

The cops wanted me to tell them what I suspected. I remained silent becasuse it just didn't seem right.

By Tuesday afternoon, we had had to sign so many forms allowing xrays, MRI's and CT scans. This time they wanted to perform a nuclear Bone Injection.

I put my foot down and said NO. While They told me what a bad father I was for not allowing this, my wife just cried. I couldn't understand how this procedure could help him. He had already been released from hospital on friday night into foster care!

We continued to refuse until we got a phone call from the Director or DCS. SHe wanted to speak to us. It was about 5.30 pm on Tuesday arvo.

She said "It would appear that the hospital has made an error with the original xrays. YOur son is fine other than some mucosal thickening (bronchiolotis) in his respiratory tract. YOu can pick them up as soon as you want"

I swore.

I swore again but remained calm.

We picked up the kids and The director of the hospital called us to tell us that they knew on FRIDAY that he was fine but thought they had better get their 'expert' to have a look. He was on leave and they had to wait until Tuesday ARVO!"

We have an appt to see the director on Wednesday.

I never thought this sort of could happen to us. We are a middle aged, middle income family with no crimimal history. A bit of post natal was all that could be found...

What I want to know is - Did some other poor little baby have to go home with abusive carers because they mixed up his xrays? Was he diagnosed with a chest infection and sent home with broken bones?

Who had my kids? How where they treated?

Will I be reimbursed for the unpaid leave I had to take becasue police wouldn't release me early enough to get to work?

My kids are young enough to forget this. My wife and I will never forget. We both thought each other was guilty. I really despised her for a few days and she probably despised me.

SHould we sue? Should we just let it go and move on?
The one thing I will say about this is get good legal advice , if you don't > innocent or not the record will stand , you need it expunged NOW
Spend a couple of hundred and find out that the 150k you're due wont ease the pain much but it can ease the way a little .
Good luck
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:39 PM   #27
mrih8hsv
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im lost for words (i have a 6 month old daughter) that is unbelivable to do that to a parent again im lost for words (hope it all works out) i would see a lawyer also
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:39 PM   #28
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I have no idea where to start whn it comes to legal issues. Is there a particular type of solicitor/lawyer I need?
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:47 PM   #29
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HELLO! Today Tonight, Nine network, Seven,Ten.
FFS I would be sprouting this from the rooftops!
How dare they!!!!!
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Old 31-10-2008, 11:45 PM   #30
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mate - where are you based (VIC/NSW)?
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