Snake in my bed...

[Scott]

Righto, now I grew up in little town 500km's west of Sydney and had more than my share of time playing with every animal under the sun, day in, day out. You'd think that the odd reptile making it's way into the house wouldn't bother me considering that at one stage or another I've had one, two or three of just about everything crawling, climbing or slithering it's way over the threshold. But I'll tell you a secret....... I am scared freakin stiff of snakes.

Anyway, wind the clock forward a few decades to 2007 and me and the missus bought a big old place in Brisbane which we are starting to renovate with a plan of settling here for a while.

Not long after getting here, the wife has run into some health issues that we've been addressing and last Tuesday was the day she went into hospital for surgery. I did all the husbandly duties, hung around waiting, there when she woke up etc etc and at the end of the night, kissed her cheek and went home as she would have to stay the night under observation.

So I get home, everythings pretty normal, watch Fox for a little while, couple of beers and head off to bed. I got to sleep pretty well straight away which is odd for me when the missus isn't there but what the hey, take it when you get it right? All must have been pretty good but the cat started annoying the crap out of me running around at about 2am. I ignored it, straight back to sleep only to be woken about half an hour later by the cat being a spastic on the end of the bed. A quick wave of the arms and the cat seemed to settle down.

7am rolls around, alarm goes off and I throw the covers off and get up. As I'm getting up, I notice some stains on the quilt. A moment later, I realise that it's not "some" stains but blood all over the bed!

Naturally, first thing I check for is to see if I'm bleeding - no. Next thing I think is maybe the cat was bleeding last night so I go to find it. As I walk out the room I squish a bit of something on the floor but with my head wondering wtf is going I ignored it and went to find the cat. Upon getting into the lounge, I spot the cat playing with something but I call her over and inspect her for cuts or scratches...... nothing??

Back into the bedroom I go, still puzzled when the mobile starts ringing. I answer the phone and it's the wife calling from her hospital bed, wanting to give me an update on what the surgeon told her etc and all I could do was tell her about the blood all over the place and ask what the hell caused it??

After she gave me an ear bashing about not listening to her when she's just had surgery I shut up and listened. Whilst on the phone, walking around the house nodding and asking pertinant questions, I spot something odd on the bedroom floor. It's a bit squashed but I pick it up anyway and inspect it.

In my hand I have about an inch of what appears to be a piece of snake abdomen. AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!

I can tell you my stomach did a backflip and I near filled my duds. Damn I have a phobia of snakes. I dropped said "chunk" and did the maths in my head that told me the bloody mongrel pig of a cat had been playing with a snake on my bed! WHILST I WAS IN IT!!!!! Furthermore, the blood stains all over the white quilt were snake blood, and not just a little, friggen heaps of the stuff!! But how the hell did a snake get into my house? The cat is an indoor cat. The house is raised quite high. This snake was too small (or so I thought) to climb it's way in?? The snake btw was about 400mm long.

With this realisation, I looked around the floor and saw chunks of snake all over the place. Baby snake I grant you but snake nonetheless. More wandering around revealed more and more snakey bits with the grand finale of finding the longest bit and head under the dining room table.

Well, I was feeling ill. I got the dustpan etc cleaned up all the bits and put it it a box to work out what it was later on. YUK.

An hour or so later, I arrived at the hospital and told my wife all about how the cat was playing with a snake on the bed whilst I was in it blah blah blah and every nurse who came by was amazed and wanted to know all about my ordeal which I duly repeated in every detail. I told a few people from work too who just couldn't believe it!

That afternoon, I got the wife home, clean sheets on the bed and went about my job of making her feel loved and comfortable but I had this niggling feeling that I wanted to identify the snake. After getting her to bed, I hit the web and searched and searched and searched for this mystery asp. Finally, after hours of looking, I found it. It wasn't a snake at all but a bloody "three clawed worm skink" whatever the frig that is - if you ask me, it's a snake.

A "three clawed worm skink" is apparently a skink that grows to about 400mm, has no legs, is pencil thin and has 3 tiny little spurs on it's body for reasons unknown - only just visible and far too small for walking anyway.

PHEW!! Lizards I can handle, snakes I can not. Oh well, all's well that ends well I figure...... but it wasn't over.....was it.

Tonight, out on the rear patio chatting away, my wife gets up and moves as quick as she can up the stairs. She didn't move too quick but for a lady who's just come out of surgery she moved pretty fast. In all my concern for her, I didn't twig that she was rabbitting on about "WHAT IS THAT????" on the ground behind me. As I turn around, sure as anything, a bloody baby snake is winding it's way straight past where we were sitting and under a potplant.

FFS!!!! I would have left the bugger there but with the wife (and the mother inlaw) both behind me I had to sort it out. I pull on my boots, grab the broom and try to adhere to the shout's of "DON'T HURT IT!!!!!"

Anyway, it turns out to be another one of these stupid work skinks too. Tell you what, looks like a snake, slithers like a snake, is a bloody snake for mine.

What's the go with these things? Are they everywhere or just my house? How do I get rid of the sneaky, slimy, slithering little bastards?

Here's a link that shows what they look like. Please remember that they look much meaner in real life - just like a king cobra or similar ;)

The one pictured looks a bit like a worm (funnily enough ) but I kid you not, they move just like a snake and about as fast.


http://www.snakecatcher.com/threeclawedwormskink.htm

Yours faithfully,

A 100kg Snake Sissy.

ps - I didn't plan to write War and Peace so cheers to anyone who bothered to read the whole thing!!!

[Green X]

95kg Snake pussy hear LOL, i hate the things, if one slithers across the road and I see it wile driving I shiver. I got a mate who gives me chit about it, he is afraid of rats and mice for **** sake and he gives me chit about being afraid of snakes.

When out bush any poison's Snake that gets to close get hit with a 6 shot from the 12gage LOL

[Geez Louise]

There is one kind of snake I don't mind in my bed...but...ekkk...slithery snakes and there skin...Yuk. Put me down in the "they give me the creeps" catergory too!

[Kryton]

the only other thing worse than a snake is a spider in your bed. (for all those that remember what happened to me)
it does bring back memories though of my younger days.
we used to have bunk beds, my ex step brother had his "prized" budgie in a cage on top of the wardrobe.
i had top bunk, about level with the cage itself.
anyway, i wake up one morning to find my doona and parts of myself covered in blood, feathers and body parts.......and my cat laying beside me cleaning its paws.
cats, what would you do without them!

[Scott]

Originally Posted by davway

anyway, i wake up one morning to find my doona and parts of myself covered in blood, feathers and body parts.......and my cat laying beside me cleaning its paws.
cats, what would you do without them!

hahaha, one of my cats burst into s smoking hair ball trying to get my budgie when I was a kid. Had a strip heater on the floor under the cage in my bedroom. I'll give the cat 10 points for commitment though!

[rodderz]

Now that I've stopped laughing after that read, it looks like a bloody scrubworm!

There are legless lizards down this way too, endangered I think but still, you'd be inclined to give it a whack with the shovel if you spotted it and thought it was a joe blake

[Scott]

From what I can gather, the "three clawed worm skink" is highly endangered. I've got heaps, if the RSPCA or Wildlife mob are reading, feel free to come and take as many as you want.

[Scott]

Originally Posted by rodderz

Now that I've stopped laughing after that read, it looks like a bloody scrubworm!

Glad my misery can entertain someone lol.

Originally Posted by rodderz

There are legless lizards down this way too, endangered I think but still, you'd be inclined to give it a whack with the shovel if you spotted it and thought it was a joe blake

The real one was a bit skinnier and a bit longer, around 40cm. Can't believe they move like a snake. Dirty, rotten, cold blooded, scaly, evil looking things. Did I just describe my mother inlaw or the hybrid snake thing?

Dear MIL, just a j/k, you're beautiful!

[falzoony]

Ok, half way through reading that I had to get my legs off the ground (fearing snakes being at my feet). I don't know how I'm going to get into bed tonight.

[Nostalgia]

Originally Posted by Geez Louise

There is one kind of snake I don't mind in my bed...but...ekkk...slithery snakes and there skin...Yuk. Put me down in the "they give me the creeps" catergory too!

LOL at Geez Louise's liking for a one eyed python !!! : But as for finding bits of snake all over the house, No thanks.

[XAGSV8]

LOL great story.

There is only one thing worse then a snake (skink) in your bed. Getting home and finding a snake skin in your bedroom. I tell you something I didn't sleep well for a couple of weeks. A good snake is a dead snake.

[Scott]

Originally Posted by XAGSV8

There is only one thing worse then a snake in your bed. Getting home and finding a snake skin in your bedroom. I tell you something I didn't sleep well for a couple of weeks. A good snake is a dead snake.

Oh hell no. That'd be freaky.

[V3RSAC3]

geez mann i feel ya pain i HATE SNAKES there my worst fear, i woulda killed that bastard!!! ... reading this i took me feet off the floor and there on the chair now ... eeeekk ... that picture has made me feel all exposed ... eeww ...

haha i enjoyed reading the whole story though aswell ;) haha

98kg snake sissy!!

[V3RSAC3]

Originally Posted by XAGSV8

There is only one thing worse then a snake (skink) in your bed. Getting home and finding a snake skin in your bedroom. I tell you something I didn't sleep well for a couple of weeks. A good snake is a dead snake.

i'd seriously move out of the house and buy a new one never to step foot in it agian ... i don't mind it when you can see them (although i can't look at them), it's when you can't thats the problem!!!

[V3RSAC3]

Originally Posted by falzoony

Ok, half way through reading that I had to get my legs off the ground (fearing snakes being at my feet). I don't know how I'm going to get into bed tonight.

same freaking thing john ... eeeeeewwwwwww

[chief]

I am over 100kg and absolutely hate snakes. Spiders I can deal because I can step on them, snakes you can't. A good snake is a dead snake.

[normxb]

For All those that said -

A Good Snake Is A Dead Snake

Damn it , "You're Right"

I'm A Bushy , and I Hate 'em .



2 things to remember :-

They're Protected , unless attacking you (every one of them is attacking me)

More people get bitten trying to kill them with a shovel / spade .
12 gauge , double barrel is the best .

Norm

[GSH]

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dude i have a python, and the just tryed to take my hand off. My hearts still pumping, shes never done that before

[Bucknaked]

Originally Posted by GTP006

All must have been pretty good but the cat started annoying the crap out of me running around at about 2am. I ignored it, straight back to sleep only to be woken about half an hour later by the cat being a spastic on the end of the bed. A quick wave of the arms and the cat seemed to settle down.

In cat language, he was saying, wakey wakey hand off snakey.

I lived in Malaysia as a kid for 2 years. We were informed about snakes and especially the ones you find in your bath. Small black snakes which enter the house through drains. They looked worms, but they had a deadly bite. The only place they were able to bite you was the webbing between your fingers and toes. Quite often when you went for a shower, in the bathtub would be these small snakes. A bucket of hot water to wash the snake down the drain usually took care of that problem for another day.

[trick_xd]

LoL ... I have a python that I have had for Nealy 11 years and she is just over 14foot long and her enclosier is at my bedroom door right next to the front door.

Snakes are ok if you know they are there.

When I was a kid I was scared of snakes ... So I got one so I would not be scared anymore.

I hate Big spiders ... BUT I want to get a bird eating spider..

[falzoony]

Originally Posted by normxb

For All those that said -

A Good Snake Is A Dead Snake

Damn it , "You're Right"

I'm A Bushy , and I Hate 'em .



2 things to remember :-

They're Protected , unless attacking you (every one of them is attacking me)

More people get bitten trying to kill them with a shovel / spade .
12 gauge , double barrel is the best .

Norm

In the words of Metallica:

KILL 'EM ALL!

[cuz]

Its taken me over an hour to build up the courage just to read your thread. Even the title was enough to give me the 'body shivers'!!!
I can't stand snakes! I don't hate them or want them dead but seeing as how I was born & bred in NZ, there are no snakes there and I have a MASSIVE phobia of them. Much to the amusement of some of my mates here.
If this happened to me I would still be running...... RUN FORREST RUN!!!!!

[Falcon_Phill]

My gf dosnt quite mind the snake in the bed.

[4Vman]

Thank god for cats...

[Poetic Justice]

Great story.
Snakes I don't seem to have a problem as I wouldn't expect to see one around here...

But I must say, since living here I've encounted a few white tail spiders, and most recently found one inside a pillow slip I had one hanging out to dry. Boy am I glad I found it... but since then, every time I feel so much as a twitch on my body when I'm in bed I just about soil the sheets.

[XCSEDAN]

LMFAO
ahhhhh ya wimp, though i would be worried if i woke up with blood all through my bed!

but still... scared of snakes... comon man grow some balls!

by the way... a word of warning, aparently a baby snake is more poisenous then a fully grown one, i remember some-one telling me that (might have been in a drunken conversation but i cant remember : )

[Racecraft]

a great read GTp.. i am still scared from reaching in the bushes as a kid to get the cricket ball and was an inch away from patting a blue tongue lizard...
Unfortunately for mother nature, if it has scales and doesn't swim I can do without thanks...

[atec77]

Originally Posted by GTP006

Righto, now I grew up in little town 500km's west of Sydney and had more than my share of time playing with every animal under the sun, day in, day out. You'd think that the odd reptile making it's way into the house wouldn't bother me considering that at one stage or another I've had one, two or three of just about everything crawling, climbing or slithering it's way over the threshold. But I'll tell you a secret....... I am scared freakin stiff of snakes.

!

Lotsa snipps

You sir are a wuss

try coming home at 3 am full as to a backyard with the neighbours cat all sucked and stretched by a couple of wolfhounds..
MEEESSSSYYYYYY
and the bin will never smell the same .

[normxb]

Originally Posted by XCSEDAN

by the way... a word of warning, aparently a baby snake is more poisonous then a fully grown one, i remember some-one telling me that (might have been in a drunken conversation but i cant remember : )

Yep , Heard the same thing ...or at least "As poisonous"

When I Was in Sydney , a Muso mate had a Honda Prelude & never worried about where he parked it with his "Monty Anti-theft Device" on the Steering Wheel , because that's where his Python used to like to curl up / There or across the back seat ... YUK

Norm

[[Tonko]]

eww, snakes in the bed... Im scared of white tails more than them, only because i see them everywhere.

We get a few around here, but its the ones that get away that you have to worry about...
This reminds me of an argument i had with my Nan about running them over, She was trying to tell me they get stuck under the car and when you stop, they drop down and bite you, mabe a 1 in 1,000,000 chance it wouldnt get burnt to a crisp.