Marriage - Bliss or Prison?

mmhmm · 16-02-2020, 12:20 PM

Just curious,

For those married guys or those in long term living arrangements with women. Would you change your life?
Do you think it's a prison or heaven. Can you do as you want or is there the prison guard to take approval

whats your take?

roKWiz · 16-02-2020, 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mmhmm

Just curious,

. Can you do as you want or is there the prison guard to take approval

whats your take?

Don't know I'll have to ask.

**X-AHH** · 16-02-2020, 12:54 PM

I refer to my wife as "The Department of War and Finance".

roKWiz · 16-02-2020, 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xahh

I refer to my wife as "The Department of War and Finance".

DOWaF.
Love those ebay adverts where the poster writes......
"If you have to ask for permission or finance don't bother bidding"

LG17 · 16-02-2020, 01:34 PM

First one, the practice one, was a bit like prison but I successfully broke out.
Second one, going strong for 35 years now I'm told.

prydey · 16-02-2020, 01:47 PM

If you are selfish, you won't last in any relationship. Been married over 20 years and my family (wife, 2 daughters) are the most important things in my life.

**aussiblue** · 16-02-2020, 02:05 PM

After 44 years it's all good; relies on mutual respect and trust and reasonable compromise.

guzzis3 · 16-02-2020, 05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aussiblue

After 44 years it's all good; relies on mutual respect and trust and reasonable compromise.

Who or what are you married to ? I don't even get that from my EL...

Seriously though, depends on the woman, and equally on you. A lot of what spouses whinge about their partner is actually projecting their own issues.

I complained a lot....

Lugh · 16-02-2020, 08:48 PM

It depends entirely on who you marry. There is compromise of course when you share your life with someone, but my missus is great. Looks after me, spoils me rotten, and encourages me to go out and spend time and money to do the things I want to do.

Previously though I lived with a girl that basically turned out to be a manipulative and selfish person. It was all about her and what she wanted to do or buy. My priorities were inconsequential. So glad there were never any kids or mortgage with her - that would have been a prison.

Adamz Ghia · 16-02-2020, 10:20 PM

If it feels like prison you’re with the wrong person.

DOC · 16-02-2020, 10:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mmhmm

Just curious,

Can you do as you want

? Um / Lost for words.

Trevor 57 · 17-02-2020, 06:42 AM

Married 43 years this year, we lived together for 2 years prior to that, so 45 year together this August. We were 17 and 18 years old when we started living together, married at 19 and 20, it is the best thing that ever happened to me.

4 beautiful kids, 6 wonderful grand kids - what could be better

Craig@AUDI · 17-02-2020, 09:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trevor 57

4 beautiful kids, 6 wonderful grand kids - what could be better

Nothing!

Mr Brooksy · 17-02-2020, 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mmhmm

Just curious,

For those married guys or those in long term living arrangements with women. Would you change your life?
Do you think it's a prison or heaven. Can you do as you want or is there the prison guard to take approval

whats your take?

Married 14 years in April, been hands down one of the best decision of my life! I was oh so close to marrying the wrong girl back in my early 20s but thankfully it fell over due to her enjoying new found attention at Uni.

Years later I met my amazing wife, got married, struggled as newly weds like everyone else, took years to work out how each other worked and ultimately how to reasonably compromise. Enjoyed a few years as a couple only, we traveled, established a career each, bought a house... THEN had kids!

She is my cheer squad, encourager, supporter, the shove in my back that I need when I get lazy, best mate, my equal and safe place when life turns up side down.

In terms of getting what I want? Don't be stupid, I'm not a 3 year old, if anyone thinks as an adult that life is about getting everything they want, HUH! You're delusional! It's time to get out of your nappies and grow up. I've seen way too many friends along the way fall for that big fat lie, they expect the other to be their maid, money bags, or any combination of unrealistic expectations and guess what, it all falls apart. And the worst part is that they think that it's always the others fault... They never grow up.

Trevor 57 · 17-02-2020, 12:57 PM

My experience tells me that a successful relationship is easy to see, it is when before one of the parties makes a decision the first thing they think about is the other person

Citroënbender · 17-02-2020, 01:37 PM

A quick perusal of other threads by the OP, informs well.

I see this thread as a throwaway question that has attracted serious replies above anything it might merit.

blueoval · 17-02-2020, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xahh

I refer to my wife as "The Department of War and Finance".

I refer to my wife as the MOFASR. "Minister Of Finance And Sexual Relations"

Trevor 57 · 17-02-2020, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Citroënbender

A quick perusal of other threads by the OP, informs well.

I see this thread as a throwaway question that has attracted serious replies above anything it might merit.

you didn't have to reply then, did you?

Mr Brooksy · 17-02-2020, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Citroënbender

A quick perusal of other threads by the OP, informs well.

I see this thread as a throwaway question that has attracted serious replies above anything it might merit.

It's kinda nice to see the other side of the story coming out though. The amount of whinging and complaining in some threads like this often means you're up against the "popular voice" if you say that your other half is great value.

I dare say that if the tone started with "other halves are impossible" then it would turn into the usual...

mmhmm · 23-02-2020, 11:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Citroënbender

A quick perusal of other threads by the OP, informs well.

I see this thread as a throwaway question that has attracted serious replies above anything it might merit.

It is not a throwaway question. I geniunly wanted to see how our fellow men perceived marriage. The answer i got is an insight.

after a 16 year marriage that ended i just wanted opinions. I believe they have all the rights, and really drained my income and business. Had to let people go as used business money to pay for the courts.

There was nothing wrong with getting peoples opinion. I just wanted their insight.

Crazy Dazz · 23-02-2020, 11:43 PM

My Marriage and my family gave my life purpose. I would not give up my kids for anything. Having something you would die to protect, and that is worth dying for, is extremely fulfilling.

As a uterus, my ex did an ok job. I would not have my kids without her, so I'm grateful for that.
For everything else, she was terrible, a miserable selfish psychopath.

GT0132 · 24-02-2020, 09:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mmhmm

It is not a throwaway question. I geniunly wanted to see how our fellow men perceived marriage. The answer i got is an insight.

after a 16 year marriage that ended i just wanted opinions. I believe they have all the rights, and really drained my income and business. Had to let people go as used business money to pay for the courts.

There was nothing wrong with getting peoples opinion. I just wanted their insight.

Me personally, I'm married although I don't see what all the fuss is about. If you love someone and want to spend the rest of your life with them, why do you need as piece of paper to prove that.

Also times change and people change , so while at the moment a person may think they want to spend the rest of their life with someone, that can change as evidenced by our ever increasing divorce rate.

Not sure why kids are brought into it from the posts above. If you don't love your kids and think they are the best thing that has happened to you in your life you have a problem.

roKWiz · 24-02-2020, 11:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GT0132

Me personally, I'm married although I don't see what all the fuss is about. If you love someone and want to spend the rest of your life with them, why do you need as piece of paper to prove that.

Guess I can not comment on the marriage bit, never had that piece of paper, never wanted it or thought of it as being necessary but my gal and I have been together for 34 years.
We have both always done whatever we wanted to do whenever.

Kids never entered the equation.

kaniSS · 24-02-2020, 12:26 PM

If you want to stop having sex get married. Close thread.

marty351 · 24-02-2020, 12:42 PM

Wagner just got a new volume.

Ben73 · 24-02-2020, 12:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaniSS

If you want to stop having sex get married. Close thread.

Sorry to hear about your experiences.

I’ve been married for 3 years, together for 12. It’s pretty great. I don’t understand people who get married after a few months together. If it’s the right person and you have known them for a while it should be a good experience.

I know marriages break down for many many reasons, but the last time a middle aged guy went on and on to me about how I should never get married because all women are the same blah blah, he was a complete miserable @&$! I’m pretty sure his personality was a major contributor to his problems.
Yet people like him whether they’re male or female often blame everyone else for their own issues.

Trevor 57 · 24-02-2020, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaniSS

If you want to stop having sex get married. Close thread.

I am also sorry for your experience, never happened to me, but obviously a problem for you

hayseed · 24-02-2020, 02:52 PM

I should add, that I'm happily married (& been together 20 odd yrs) with 4 great Kids......

guzzis3 · 24-02-2020, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GT0132

Also times change and people change , so while at the moment a person may think they want to spend the rest of their life with someone, that can change as evidenced by our ever increasing divorce rate.

People's expectations of marriage changed and societies tolerance of divorce changed. Marriage isn't about sex and romance but a lot of people get married because they want sex and romance.

A long term relationship is about teaming up to take on life. Our grandparents knew that, people post ww2 expected more. When they didn't get it they changed the law so they could bail more easily.

People get together because they want to have sex. It takes 2 - 3 years for the novelty to wear off and only then do you really start to notice the person inside the body you've been sleeping with. You probably have only a 50% chance of liking that person. That's fine as long as you haven't tied yourselves together during that honeymoon period, financially, matrimonially or worse of all parentally. If there are no kids you can take the hit and get on with it, if there are kids you are ruining their lives. Ask me how I know....

prydey · 24-02-2020, 05:09 PM

Don't get married. Just find someone you hate and buy them a house