Welcome to the Australian Ford Forums forum.

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and inserts advertising. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members, respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features without post based advertising banners. Registration is simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us.

Please Note: All new registrations go through a manual approval queue to keep spammers out. This is checked twice each day so there will be a delay before your registration is activated.

Go Back   Australian Ford Forums > General Topics > Non Ford Related Community Forums > The Bar

The Bar For non Automotive Related Chat

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 25-11-2017, 12:19 AM   #481
.:4:.
Kicking back
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Western sydney
Posts: 8,685
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by NTF6 View Post
How does that obese ****er have a butt crack in the front?
There was a term for that we used to use way back when but I won say it. It's not pc. Obviously mirrors are a new thing. Same as walking and doorways.
.:4:. is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 25-11-2017, 12:31 AM   #482
Syndrome
Ford screwed the Falcon
 
Syndrome's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 7,248
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by NTF6 View Post
How does that obese ****er have a butt crack in the front?
It appears his shorts are pulling the fat surrounding his belly button together which has formed a vertical slit.
__________________
Falcon: 1960 - 2016

My cars

Current ride
2016 FG X XR6 - 6 speed manual

Previous rides
2009 FG XR6 - 6 speed auto
2006 BF MkII XT ESP - 6 speed auto
2003 BA XT V8 - 5 speed manual
1999 AU Forte - 5 speed manual
1997 EL Fairmont - 4 speed auto
1990 EAII Fairmont Ghia - 4 speed auto
Syndrome is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 11-01-2018, 03:27 PM   #483
Lunch
Wait, what?
 
Lunch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: South eastern melbourne
Posts: 2,677
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that we pay council rates?
Lunch is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 11-01-2018, 05:30 PM   #484
NTF6
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Desert City
Posts: 2,326
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lunch View Post
Why is it that we pay council rates?

image


Wow, 4 stop and go men just for 1 digger to cross the road.
Why did the digger cross the road?


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
2017 Mustang GT (Magnetic)
NTF6 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 11-01-2018, 05:37 PM   #485
Junkyard-Dog
*barks incessantly
 
Junkyard-Dog's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: SA
Posts: 1,563
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that the car in front of me today could only manage to labour along at 50km/h in the 80km/h zone while it was a solid white line but had no worries exceeding the 80km/h limit each time a dotted line appeared..?
Junkyard-Dog is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 11-01-2018, 05:44 PM   #486
NTF6
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Desert City
Posts: 2,326
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Junkyard-Dog View Post
Why is it that the car in front of me today could only manage to labour along at 50km/h in the 80km/h zone while it was a solid white line but had no worries exceeding the 80km/h limit each time a dotted line appeared..?


Because they were a ****tard!


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
2017 Mustang GT (Magnetic)
NTF6 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
2 users like this post:
Old 11-01-2018, 05:52 PM   #487
Junkyard-Dog
*barks incessantly
 
Junkyard-Dog's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: SA
Posts: 1,563
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by NTF6 View Post
Because they were a ****tard!
True.
Junkyard-Dog is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 11-01-2018, 06:27 PM   #488
Lunch
Wait, what?
 
Lunch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: South eastern melbourne
Posts: 2,677
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by NTF6 View Post
Why did the digger cross the Road?
I’m pretty sure they were going back to the shed for smoko
Lunch is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
2 users like this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 09:24 AM   #489
Syndrome
Ford screwed the Falcon
 
Syndrome's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 7,248
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that women are OK to be seen in bikinis in public but if you catch them in their underwear, they freak?

__________________
Falcon: 1960 - 2016

My cars

Current ride
2016 FG X XR6 - 6 speed manual

Previous rides
2009 FG XR6 - 6 speed auto
2006 BF MkII XT ESP - 6 speed auto
2003 BA XT V8 - 5 speed manual
1999 AU Forte - 5 speed manual
1997 EL Fairmont - 4 speed auto
1990 EAII Fairmont Ghia - 4 speed auto
Syndrome is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
4 users like this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 11:22 AM   #490
Trump
bitch lasagne
 
Trump's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Sonova Beach
Posts: 15,110
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Syndrome View Post
Why is it that women are OK to be seen in bikinis in public but if you catch them in their underwear, they freak?

image
Because logic and reason are concepts they are yet to grasp.
__________________




Scaled Business Solutions
For Your Small Business IT Needs
Trump is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
4 users like this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 11:43 AM   #491
Glen 5150
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
Glen 5150's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,460
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it - most women at the checkouts at Coles and Woolies only decide to get their purse out to pay after the total amount is revealed? You stand there patiently for 5 -10 minutes as they put through $200 - $300 worth of groceries and then they decide to go through their handbag and purse looking for their card. "Oh, have you got a rewards card also"? Hold on i'll just rummage through my purse for another minute while I find that also. It must be a male thing, I have my cash or card out ready to go before the first item is scanned.

And don't get me started on parents letting their little angels press the buttons on the ATM machines while you wait behind them patiently. "Oh you pressed the wrong button silly billy, just start again, this man behind won't mind waiting" FFS!!

End of rant lol
Glen 5150 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 14-01-2018, 11:50 AM   #492
Syndrome
Ford screwed the Falcon
 
Syndrome's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 7,248
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glen 5150 View Post
And don't get me started on parents letting their little angels press the buttons on the ATM machines while you wait behind them patiently. "Oh you pressed the wrong button silly billy, just start again, this man behind won't mind waiting" FFS!!

End of rant lol
Because we raise children these days without setting boundaries and look at where it is getting us.
__________________
Falcon: 1960 - 2016

My cars

Current ride
2016 FG X XR6 - 6 speed manual

Previous rides
2009 FG XR6 - 6 speed auto
2006 BF MkII XT ESP - 6 speed auto
2003 BA XT V8 - 5 speed manual
1999 AU Forte - 5 speed manual
1997 EL Fairmont - 4 speed auto
1990 EAII Fairmont Ghia - 4 speed auto
Syndrome is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
2 users like this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 12:23 PM   #493
olfella
Cranky old bastard
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 9,394
Default Re: Why is it.................?

My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm but I gave her some superglue instead.

She’s still not talking to me!
__________________
"But really...what can possibly go wrong"
olfella is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 14-01-2018, 01:11 PM   #494
GO FURTHER
Moderator
 
GO FURTHER's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 7,940
Tech Writer: Recognition for the technical writers of AFF - Issue reason: Fitting New Iridium Plugs & the state of the old ones - (Photo Essay) 
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it when I'm lying down with my eyes closed... People ask "are you sleeping?".

.... "No, just pretending I'm dead".
GO FURTHER is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
3 users like this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 01:15 PM   #495
Sar4890
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
Sar4890's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Posts: 1,828
Default Re: Why is it.................?

My personal favorite is when you cant find something is people ask where did you last have it
If i could remember that it wouldnt be lost!
Sar4890 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
2 users like this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 01:18 PM   #496
Rallye Sport
RS The Faster Fords
 
Rallye Sport's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Westralia
Posts: 1,694
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by GO FURTHER View Post
Why is it when I'm lying down with my eyes closed... People ask "are you sleeping?".

.... "No, just pretending I'm dead".
Just checking my eyelids for holes.
__________________
Escort RS2000 Restored factory a/c and alloys.
TD Cortina Unrestored 35 000km 6cyl manual.
Mk1 GT Cortina Project.
FG XR50 Daily.
Rallye Sport is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 01:19 PM   #497
solarite_guy
Donating Member
Donating Member1
 
solarite_guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 11,429
Technical Contributor: For members who share their technical expertise. - Issue reason: He continually offers Technical Advice that is based on years of experience and knowledge he has gained along the way. The advice has ranged from replies to questions across the various Threads to seeking information from OP and taking that away to undert 
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sar4890 View Post
My personal favorite is when you cant find something is people ask where did you last have it
If i could remember that it wouldnt be lost!
The better question is "when do you last remember it?".

If I stop to ask myself that question, then put it out of my head and go about my business, 15 minutes later, boom, it pops into my head.
solarite_guy is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 14-01-2018, 01:20 PM   #498
Sar4890
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
Sar4890's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Posts: 1,828
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rallye Sport View Post
Just checking my eyelids for holes.
Haha thats brilliant.
Sar4890 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 01:26 PM   #499
jgs393
Regular Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 106
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that when I put my phone in my pocket it manages to ring somebody all on it's own, but when I want to make a call I have to turn it on, swipe screen , enter a code, go to contacts, find contact, press contact then press dial?
jgs393 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
5 users like this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 01:41 PM   #500
Rallye Sport
RS The Faster Fords
 
Rallye Sport's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Westralia
Posts: 1,694
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that when people sms me and I voice call them back right away they don't answer their phone? you had it in you hand a second ago.
__________________
Escort RS2000 Restored factory a/c and alloys.
TD Cortina Unrestored 35 000km 6cyl manual.
Mk1 GT Cortina Project.
FG XR50 Daily.
Rallye Sport is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
3 users like this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 01:44 PM   #501
Lunch
Wait, what?
 
Lunch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: South eastern melbourne
Posts: 2,677
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that straight after I’ve sent someone an sms they feel the need to call, if I wanted to talk, I’d have called
Lunch is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 14-01-2018, 05:32 PM   #502
Syndrome
Ford screwed the Falcon
 
Syndrome's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 7,248
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sar4890 View Post
My personal favorite is when you cant find something is people ask where did you last have it
If i could remember that it wouldnt be lost!
Or why is it people say 'it is always in the last place you look'? Obviously once you find it you will stop looking!
__________________
Falcon: 1960 - 2016

My cars

Current ride
2016 FG X XR6 - 6 speed manual

Previous rides
2009 FG XR6 - 6 speed auto
2006 BF MkII XT ESP - 6 speed auto
2003 BA XT V8 - 5 speed manual
1999 AU Forte - 5 speed manual
1997 EL Fairmont - 4 speed auto
1990 EAII Fairmont Ghia - 4 speed auto
Syndrome is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 14-01-2018, 06:02 PM   #503
Sar4890
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
Sar4890's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2016
Posts: 1,828
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it the when i take a phone call my missus feels the need to strike up a conversation with me?
Sar4890 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 14-01-2018, 08:46 PM   #504
nuthin' fancy
Lyminge, Shepway, Kent
Donating Member3
 
nuthin' fancy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Geelong - Go Cats
Posts: 3,197
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by XB GS 351 Coupe View Post
Why is it that the English language especially written is falling apart??

Why don't supposedly educated people know the difference between simple words like

there, their, they're

bought, brought

here, hear

have, of ..... (this one especially has me stuffed, people using 'of' instead of 'have' seems to be the norm these days. as in 'I could of gone to the beach' instead of the correct 'I should have stayed home, this sun burn hurts and I can't get the sand out of my ****'.)

lose, loose

no, know

whole, hole

etc etc etc

It annoys me that kids are learning Japanese and various other languages at school, yet struggle with basic English and Mathematics.




Fixed
__________________
Mel Brooks sums it up best;

"Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die, tragedy is when I get a paper cut"
nuthin' fancy is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 08:47 PM   #505
nuthin' fancy
Lyminge, Shepway, Kent
Donating Member3
 
nuthin' fancy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Geelong - Go Cats
Posts: 3,197
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Giant Cranium View Post
Awkward!
Totes awks.
__________________
Mel Brooks sums it up best;

"Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die, tragedy is when I get a paper cut"
nuthin' fancy is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 11:07 PM   #506
commodorenutt
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
commodorenutt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Sydney
Posts: 2,530
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that every second fool these days claims to be a "CEO"

In days gone by, small and even medium companies never used the title - it was only larger corporates, where they had an executive level of staff, that needed a "Chief" amongst them.

Now every 2nd news article has someone calling themselves a CEO of a sttartup, where they're the only person "employed" or it's a 2-5 person small business, or even worse - one I read today was a volunteer association that has 6 members, and the spokesperson for it called themselves the CEO! Hell every self-employed tradie is a CEO at the rate it's going.

It's like GT Falcons, for every 1 real CEO out there there's 25 more fakers claiming a few fancy letters.
commodorenutt is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 14-01-2018, 11:18 PM   #507
marty351
Shenanigans..............
 
marty351's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Footscrazy
Posts: 12,487
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by commodorenutt View Post
Why is it that every second fool these days claims to be a "CEO"

In days gone by, small and even medium companies never used the title - it was only larger corporates, where they had an executive level of staff, that needed a "Chief" amongst them.

Now every 2nd news article has someone calling themselves a CEO of a sttartup, where they're the only person "employed" or it's a 2-5 person small business, or even worse - one I read today was a volunteer association that has 6 members, and the spokesperson for it called themselves the CEO! Hell every self-employed tradie is a CEO at the rate it's going.

It's like GT Falcons, for every 1 real CEO out there there's 25 more fakers claiming a few fancy letters.

At least Homer Simpson was executive vice-president of his company.
marty351 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 15-01-2018, 09:32 AM   #508
commodorenutt
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
commodorenutt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Sydney
Posts: 2,530
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it.....

That these ignorant greenies fail to see the big picture, and continue to promote the "all about me" attitude?

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-01-1...arging/9235564

The article notes how the average fossil-fuel car, with 40% excise on fuel, contributes around 4.5c per km to road funding, whilst electric cars contribute nothing.
It then goes on to suggest a distance based, or "user pays" tax system for road funding - meaning owners of electric cars will have to contribute to funding the very roads they are using.

The article quotes a clown with a Tesla who is only willing to pay the distance tax on one condition - he wants an "air quality tax" on fossil fueled cars:
Quote:
"Western Australia resident Rob Dean, who has owned his Tesla Model S for more than three years, said he would be happy to pay a "fairly proportioned distance tax" to pay for his road use, but there's a catch.

"I would also expect any progressive government to add an air quality tax on fossil fuel vehicles that emit damaging tailpipe emissions into the air we breath, in turn placing a heavy burden on the health system," he said."
Where the F%*# does he think the power comes from for the majority of electric cars on the road?

Shifting emissions from the tailpipe to the power station is the reality these self-entitled elitists fail to see. Maybe 1 in 100 might be truly "green" charging only with solar, but they would be a very small minority, especially since WA, where he resides, generated just 7% of their power from renewable sources in 2014-2015: https://rac.com.au/home-life/info/st...e-energy-in-wa
commodorenutt is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 15-01-2018, 10:24 AM   #509
solarite_guy
Donating Member
Donating Member1
 
solarite_guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 11,429
Technical Contributor: For members who share their technical expertise. - Issue reason: He continually offers Technical Advice that is based on years of experience and knowledge he has gained along the way. The advice has ranged from replies to questions across the various Threads to seeking information from OP and taking that away to undert 
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by commodorenutt View Post
The article quotes a clown with a Tesla who is only willing to pay the distance tax on one condition - he wants an "air quality tax" on fossil fueled cars:


Where the F%*# does he think the power comes from for the majority of electric cars on the road?
From thin air of course...or does it grow on trees?...oh, I remember now, the tooth fairy.

That's it. That's the ticket.
solarite_guy is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
This user likes this post:
Old 15-01-2018, 10:45 AM   #510
Trump
bitch lasagne
 
Trump's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Sonova Beach
Posts: 15,110
Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by commodorenutt View Post
Why is it that every second fool these days claims to be a "CEO"

In days gone by, small and even medium companies never used the title - it was only larger corporates, where they had an executive level of staff, that needed a "Chief" amongst them.

Now every 2nd news article has someone calling themselves a CEO of a sttartup, where they're the only person "employed" or it's a 2-5 person small business, or even worse - one I read today was a volunteer association that has 6 members, and the spokesperson for it called themselves the CEO! Hell every self-employed tradie is a CEO at the rate it's going.

It's like GT Falcons, for every 1 real CEO out there there's 25 more fakers claiming a few fancy letters.
It's this bullcrap environment of "entrepeneurship" that the media have been trying to ram down our throats. It has bred a rather silly environment that has all sorts of poo kickers thinking they too can be business owners and make it big. There's a reason 90% of startups fail...
__________________




Scaled Business Solutions
For Your Small Business IT Needs
Trump is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
3 users like this post:
Reply


Forum Jump


All times are GMT +11. The time now is 02:38 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Other than what is legally copyrighted by the respective owners, this site is copyright www.fordforums.com.au
Positive SSL