Depression, Anxiety

[creative]

Just thought I would check in and see how everyone is doing.... Glad to see some great results from everyone!

to comment on a few posts and my thought process:

media and the news - stopped watching it full stop. It simply bull**** propagander from every mainstream outlet ( the banning of sky news on youtube is a testament to that imo)

Drinking -
good to see others having the same thoughts I did... I used to be a heavy drinker. Ran pubs, nightclubs etc and would do a bottle of bacardi before I finished work... and then go out. No idea how I managed but I got tired of feeling like **** and my moods would quickly become violent ( which is the complete opposite of me and honestly scared me) These days I might have a beer and thats it... I do enjoy drinking, but I enjoy how I feel without it more!

Meds and doctors - A good doc is a must. I was lucky and found a great one. Listened to my concerns, expressed his with me, had plans and timescales as to how long I was going to be on them etc. I feel very fortunate and I would certainly recommend shopping around with one to find you feel happy with!

Diet - This was, to me, one of the biggest suprises I had and just how much it affected me and my moods! Im the fussiest person ever when it comes to food and have no interest in it.. I eat because I have to but it turns out im type 2 diabetic and now I have discovered I'm lactose intolerant. I have reduced sugar, carb and dairy products and feel so much better for it. I highly recommend those that struggle to also look at dietary requirements.

So how am I doing?

Honestly, I had a bad spell a couple of weeks ago but this time I am fortunate enough, that I recognised the signs. Insomnia, unhapyness, stressed, angry, frustrated, not eating, couldnt stand being around people, including the missus but this time I saw it and opened up. Sat the missus down, told her how I was feeling, told my boss at work who were supportive. Seriously considered taking meds again but this time I felt stronger a decided it would be the last resort.
I pulled my self out of the dark hole that was starting to consume me again, it was hard, dont get me wrong but it has also shown me that I can do this.... Ive got this...and that is a great feeling!

Then covid kicked in again and lockdowns happen and now I get to support the missus as she is feeling this round. Why you ask?

She works for ServiceNSW and is one of the people you call regarding government business grants and I have watched her the past 4 weeks slowly decline in coping. From the moment she starts work to when she finishes after a 12 hour shift of being abused, threatened, shouted at, all for trying to help people. Just yesterday, by 10am she had 4 people threaten they were suicidal just to try and make her feel guilty into changing her response, abused, and people blaming her because the free money they want wont be available for another 2 weeks because there are over 50,000 applications to be processed, is taking its toll. These people manning the phones are human.. they arent trained councilors,financial advisors or care givers and to be thrown into this chaos and try and not let it affect them... is hard, and hard to watch.


in other news booster 4 and SN20 is on the launchpad and thats as exciting as ****... I cannot wait to see that thing lift off (or explode, either way it will be spectacular!)!

oops. wall of text, but feel better getting it out! thanks for reading!

[slowsnake]

Just skipping through all the threads and posts and somehow ended up here, lol, and I don't feel depressed, but, I do feel oppressed, suppressed, compressed and distressed, but I dont feel depressed..

But I am one of life's lucky people, have always had that gut feeling or sixth sense when and before I start feeling like sh.t, in reality I have nothing to be happy about and everything to feel ****ed off about, but I am exceedingly happy but feel like crap, everything as usual is aching, am sure it's this damn Perth weather, been raining all morning, drives me nuts, can't get anything done outside.

My neighbour Pat needs an oil change and filter, they wanted $180 to $200 for the job, its a bloody 2003 Hyundai Accent for God sake!
Went to Supercheap got a oil filter SCA brand $9 bucks, 5 litres of oil, total cost $39 bucks, and she understands that if I die anytime soon I want to be under a car doing a service than sitting in a bloody armchair in front of a heater!...

She worries about me, she's 70 yrs old, I'm 68+ and broken badly, but and a big but, I am very happy with my situation, even though it's dire, but its what I am and who I am, she gets that, and that smile when I'm all finished and take it back to her is priceless, and she saved $150 bucks to spend on herself or her grandkids, its win-win, and I love doing it!

I wish everyone could be this happy, to me it's easy, for others it's not, and I will be like this until the end, happy and satisfied with my life.



Cheers Billy

[mondeomatureguy]

Hi Guy's
I now that COVID and lockdown's are still with us all and we have to live with it i guess.
I have been thinking about the people who have been doing it tough and can't get out and who are stuck at home.
I hope you are all ok and keeping your self busy to take your mind of thing's doing things at home.

The whole of NSW is in lockdown again and i think Victoria also or parts of it anyway.
If your at home and feel you need somebody to chat with, there's always your phone to chat with a friend or e-mail.

At least one good thing " your not the only one where all in the same boat". I have a lot of music CDs and last weekend i moved the whole lot and even found a few that i thought i had lost.

So don't let COVID and the lockdown get you down and remember your not the only one that is in lockdown.

cheers guys

[MercuryT]

Excellent to read posts above.

I'm just out of hospital after another attempt. (sorry Shav)

Not sure if I'm a cat but my 9 lives are running out.

Stay safe all and yeah, depression really sucks hey.

[slowsnake]

Where in Australia do you live Merc?


Cheers Billy

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

Excellent to read posts above.

I'm just out of hospital after another attempt. (sorry Shav)

Not sure if I'm a cat but my 9 lives are running out.

Stay safe all and yeah, depression really sucks hey.

Sorry to hear that Merc. But at least you are still here with us. You may not feel like that is a good thing at the moment, but we are all better for it.

Remember to rely on the resources you have available around you. If those aren't working for you, try something different No point in doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.

Hang in there mate. I'm sure the road is hard for you, but things will get better as you go.

Originally Posted by slowsnake

Where in Australia do you live Merc?


Cheers Billy

Mercs in Hobart.

[MercuryT]

Originally Posted by slowsnake

Where in Australia do you live Merc?


Cheers Billy

Hobart mate. (as per Foxtrot....thanks slso)

[MercuryT]

Originally Posted by FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0

Sorry to hear that Merc. But at least you are still here with us. You may not feel like that is a good thing at the moment, but we are all better for it.

Remember to rely on the resources you have available around you. If those aren't working for you, try something different No point in doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.

Hang in there mate. I'm sure the road is hard for you, but things will get better as you go.

Thanks for the words and advice mate.

You have been a great support to me as has Billy, Shav, and many others.

It's interesting you say about resources as no they aren't working.

I was told to go on meds - I did and it didn't help.

I was told to do counselling - I did and it didn't help.

I was told to give up alcohol - I did and it didn't help.

I'm running out of ideas on how to fix this situation mate. It's not like I'm not open about my depression or not trying to fix it, just ridiculous how my mind works.

Wish I could stop it running and switch it off but I can't (hence the self harm)

Thanks to all though and I do appreciate people taking the time to respond to me despite my obvious problems.

Merc

[T3rminator]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

Thanks for the words and advice mate.

You have been a great support to me as has Billy, Shav, and many others.

It's interesting you say about resources as no they aren't working.

I was told to go on meds - I did and it didn't help.

I was told to do counselling - I did and it didn't help.

I was told to give up alcohol - I did and it didn't help.

I'm running out of ideas on how to fix this situation mate. It's not like I'm not open about my depression or not trying to fix it, just ridiculous how my mind works.

Wish I could stop it running and switch it off but I can't (hence the self harm)

Thanks to all though and I do appreciate people taking the time to respond to me despite my obvious problems.

Merc

Try hypnotherapy, a good one, they are not cheap. The mind is a wierd and wonderful organ. Unless you were born that way, it is our past experiences that bury things deep in our subconcious, and makes us do the things we do (although I'm aware some doctors will say its chemical etc). It worked for me in the past, no meds.


I recently dropped an email to my last hynotherapist, just to see how he was getting on. We got along really well, he really gave a sh!t about my wellbeing. He was in his late 80s when I last saw him, so he would be into his 90s now. I just wanted to check how he was, given whats been happening. He tells me his business his overwhelmed, booked out months in advance.

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

Thanks for the words and advice mate.

You have been a great support to me as has Billy, Shav, and many others.

It's interesting you say about resources as no they aren't working.

I was told to go on meds - I did and it didn't help.

I was told to do counselling - I did and it didn't help.

I was told to give up alcohol - I did and it didn't help.

I'm running out of ideas on how to fix this situation mate. It's not like I'm not open about my depression or not trying to fix it, just ridiculous how my mind works.

Wish I could stop it running and switch it off but I can't (hence the self harm)

Thanks to all though and I do appreciate people taking the time to respond to me despite my obvious problems.

Merc

Again, I'm no expert here, Merc, but it seems to me that the highlighted bit is what's letting you down atm. You need someone in your corner, someone who is going to be the one constant you can rely on and a therapist/counsellor/doctor/whatever is the key to you getting the help you need. The other bits and pieces, in and of their own, are not going to work. It needs to be a complete package.

It doesn't matter as to how good someone is, if you don't click with them, it will never work. Shop around until you find someone that works for you! It's clear you know where you want to be and that, at least at times, you want to be there, too. That's a great start! Now you just need that one person who's going to be your crutch, your motivator, the one that gives a crap about whether you succeed or not. If you're not getting that from your current counsellor, try another one.

I know, easier said than done when I'm not in your position, but if it means that you end up where you want to be, it will be worth the journey.

T3's experience shows what can be done when you find that right person.

All the best, mate.

[DFB FGXR6]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

Thanks for the words and advice mate.

You have been a great support to me as has Billy, Shav, and many others.

It's interesting you say about resources as no they aren't working.

I was told to go on meds - I did and it didn't help.

I was told to do counselling - I did and it didn't help.

I was told to give up alcohol - I did and it didn't help.

Merc

I'm no expert either, but can at least give you some advice to perhaps lead you down a better path.

If the meds you are on are not giving you a benefit, see you doctor and explain you concerns. It can take a lot of trial and error to get a med that works for you.

As mentioned, keep looking for a councilor or physiologist that you gel with. It can be a bit tedious telling your story every time you change, but once you find someone you trust, the conversations will be natural and helpful.

In terms of alcohol, keep trying to remove it from your life. Try and find something positive to fill that void, find something to lean upon when you find yourself needed a drink to make things better. Go for a walk, have a hot bath, wash your car, anything that interests you and keeps your mind active.

Mental health has no quick fix, it is something that many of us need to maintain, something that we need to work on to get the benefits.

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Came across this service today. I know about the service Lifeline offer via their call centre(s) and website, but was unaware of this service. Thought it may be of some use to those who are reluctant to pick up the phone and talk to a stranger.

Text Service

About the service
Short-term support for people who are feeling overwhelmed or having difficulty coping
Real-time using ‘SMS’ technology​
Confidential one-to-one with a trained Lifeline Crisis Supporter ​
Please note: Due to demand on this service there maybe times when we cannot connect you to a crisis support even during our operating times. Supporting you is important to us and you can call 13 11 14 to talk to a Crisis Supporter if our Text service is not able to connect you to a crisis supporter at any time. Please call triple zero (000) if life is in danger.

What we do
Listen without judgment
Provide a safe space to discuss your needs, worries or concerns
Work with you to explore options for support

Accessing the service
Step 1: Text 0477 13 11 14​
Step 2: Complete the pre-survey questions
Step 3: Read the Website terms of use. By using this service you accept these terms.
Step 4: You will be connected with a Crisis Supporter as soon as one is available

[slowsnake]

You're a good bloke FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0...



Cheers Billy

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Originally Posted by slowsnake

You're a good bloke FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0...



Cheers Billy

Cheers mate. Just doing my bit to try and help people.

[slowsnake]

Originally Posted by FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0

Cheers mate. Just doing my bit to try and help people.

All the good guys do!


Cheers Billy

[MercuryT]

Thank you so much to the advice and words above.

Sincerely appreciate it.

I assure you it's taken on board even if I won't directly quote if that's ok. It's given me some fantastic direction.

I've been told today I've lost my job so yeah, just another completely **** thing I now need to somehow deal with.

But I feel ok. Wouldn't say happy, but I'm not sad either.

Maybe a new start is best for me anyway as I knew it was coming.

Sorry for rambling but you all are a fantastic support to me as I don't really have anything else.

My dog I love so much but he hasn't learned English yet but that's ok as he's always there for me.

Merc

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

Thank you so much to the advice and words above.

Sincerely appreciate it.

I assure you it's taken on board even if I won't directly quote if that's ok. It's given me some fantastic direction.

I've been told today I've lost my job so yeah, just another completely **** thing I now need to somehow deal with.

But I feel ok. Wouldn't say happy, but I'm not sad either.

Maybe a new start is best for me anyway as I knew it was coming.

Sorry for rambling but you all are a fantastic support to me as I don't really have anything else.

My dog I love so much but he hasn't learned English yet but that's ok as he's always there for me.

Merc

Hey Merc, really sorry to hear about your latest news. It's hard to see someone take another hit when they're already down. But, it's good to see that you are trying to take it in a positive way. That's a great start! There's a saying that as one door closes, another opens. Keep that positive outlook and it will go a long way in helping you through these times. And, who knows, you may just end up in a better place as a result f it. Not just the job front, but also generally.

and there's no need to apologise for coming on here and talking about how you feel That's what this page is for! Keep reaching out as you are doing. None of us on here are experts (that I know of, at least) at this stuff, but there's obviously people on here who care enough to try and help you as best we can.

Gotta love dogs, no matter how you feel and how grumpy you might be, they'll still sidle up for a cuddle!

Please take care of yourself. If your dog's up for it, take him out for a walk. It will do both you and the dog wonders.

[MercuryT]

Originally Posted by FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0

Hey Merc, really sorry to hear about your latest news. It's hard to see someone take another hit when they're already down. But, it's good to see that you are trying to take it in a positive way. That's a great start! There's a saying that as one door closes, another opens. Keep that positive outlook and it will go a long way in helping you through these times. And, who knows, you may just end up in a better place as a result f it. Not just the job front, but also generally.

and there's no need to apologise for coming on here and talking about how you feel That's what this page is for! Keep reaching out as you are doing. None of us on here are experts (that I know of, at least) at this stuff, but there's obviously people on here who care enough to try and help you as best we can.

Gotta love dogs, no matter how you feel and how grumpy you might be, they'll still sidle up for a cuddle!

Please take care of yourself. If your dog's up for it, take him out for a walk. It will do both you and the dog wonders.

Hey mate.
As always thank you so much for the great advice and taking the time to help me.

I've been wanting to start my own company for years so I guess your comment is spot on - I believe i can make it work (Strata management - I'm a lawyer albeit maybe a **** one....ha) and I find that exciting.

I guess losing my job would normally really upset me. But when I've recently been taken to hospital via 2 paramedics and 4 police officers I guess it sort of puts it in perspective.

Totally agree about Terry (my Greyhound) and down here in Hobart it's about 25 degrees and absolutely beautiful day. (it won't last mate....ha)

Thank you again and for everyone else making me feel welcome and are trying to help.

Merc (Chris)

[MercuryT]

It's interesting as there are so many great people on here.

Yet look at main board post and I'm called a "lonely sook flog" (and many like it) and so on and mods don't even delete it.

Sort of defeats the purpose of being in this community as it's online abuse and bullying.

Not directed at anyone that posts in this thread but it's very disappointing.

Merc

[Charliewool]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

It's interesting as there are so many great people on here.

Yet look at main board post and I'm called a "lonely sook flog" (and many like it) and so on and mods don't even delete it.

Sort of defeats the purpose of being in this community as it's online abuse and bullying.

Not directed at anyone that posts in this thread but it's very disappointing.

Merc

Feel for you…. One question are you still drinking??

[MercuryT]

Originally Posted by Charliewool

Feel for you…. One question are you still drinking??

No.

But either way a drinker or not a person doesn't need or like online abuse which is apparently ok by the mods

[MercuryT]

Originally Posted by Charliewool

Feel for you…. One question are you still drinking??

In fact it is very (very) dangerous to someone like me who has suicidal tendencies.

[slowsnake]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

It's interesting as there are so many great people on here.

Yet look at main board post and I'm called a "lonely sook flog" (and many like it) and so on and mods don't even delete it.

Sort of defeats the purpose of being in this community as it's online abuse and bullying.

Not directed at anyone that posts in this thread but it's very disappointing.

Merc

Hey Merc, you actually sound a lot happier despite losing ya job, as for abuse just hit the report button, if you have a valid beef the mods will look at it and take the necessary action.
You have as much right to speak here on AFF as anyone else is, without fear or favour, but I know when the going gets a bit tough it can be very hard to see straight, or think straight!
I get head issues too, but we all have different coping mechanisms, but I think talking about it here is as good a way as any to unload whatever is on your mind!


Cheers Billy " been down so far I forgot which way was up " am happy now!

[buggerlugs]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

In fact it is very (very) dangerous to someone like me who has suicidal tendencies.

Maybe Forums/Social media are not good for someone in your situation ?

[MercuryT]

Originally Posted by buggerlugs

Maybe Forums/Social media are not good for someone in your situation ?

Why is that?

So anyone suicidal deserves abuse is what you're suggesting is ok?

[T3rminator]

Hey Merc, I've not really followed the threads you are involved in, so don't know who you are referring to. But one thing I'll say is that, for people who struggle with mental health, social media can be a dangerous place to navigate. You are dealing with faceless people, and there is always a very small percentage who will bully and troll. I find that those small minorities generally have some deep underlying issues themselves. Remember, bullies and trolls feed on one thing.....your reaction. Starving them of that is what irritates them the most, so maybe try the ignore button?

Its not easy being an admin / mod. Its a very fine line when deciding whether to allow members to contribute freely and openly, or censoring what people can say. Mods can't keep track on who can manage a bit of banter and who can't. I run a group myself, and sometimes you get one or two who make smart *** comments just to get a rise out of someone else. I'm often torn whether to give a warning or censor.....and stewing over it gives me mental health issues sometimes The mods here do a really good job given the number of members, and that they allow so many topics that are not car related, and are bound to raise some hard line views.

As I have said before on this thread, one of the things that has greatly helped me is reading / listening to that book / audio book "The subtle art of not giving a fck". Maybe give it a go.

Take it easy.

[Rallye Sport]

Originally Posted by T3rminator

Hey Merc, I've not really followed the threads you are involved in, so don't know who you are referring to. But one thing I'll say is that, for people who struggle with mental health, social media can be a dangerous place to navigate. You are dealing with faceless people, and there is always a very small percentage who will bully and troll. I find that those small minorities generally have some deep underlying issues themselves. Remember, bullies and trolls feed on one thing.....your reaction. Starving them of that is what irritates them the most, so maybe try the ignore button?

Its not easy being an admin / mod. Its a very fine line when deciding whether to allow members to contribute freely and openly, or censoring what people can say. Mods can't keep track on who can manage a bit of banter and who can't. I run a group myself, and sometimes you get one or two who make smart *** comments just to get a rise out of someone else. I'm often torn whether to give a warning or censor.....and stewing over it gives me mental health issues sometimes The mods here do a really good job given the number of members, and that they allow so many topics that are not car related, and are bound to raise some hard line views.

As I have said before on this thread, one of the things that has greatly helped me is reading / listening to that book / audio book "The subtle art of not giving a fck". Maybe give it a go.

Take it easy.

Good advice there.
Haven't heard the audio book I discovered the art and beauty of not giving a **** by myself.

We had a golfer at work that wouldn't hesitate hitting a golf ball at you at close range, walking in front of operating machinery and my favorite walking into a closed work area, pointing at her ball and proceeding to take her shot.
She really didn't give a ****, as much as it annoyed me I was envious of how easy her life must be by following this mantra.
So I gave it a go to a lesser extent, obviously I applied some common sense
..and guess what? It works a treat. If her membership hadn't been revoked for really not giving a **** I was actually going to thank her.

I think the ignore button is a great first step, try it Merc, you can always reverse it.
All the best mate.

[buggerlugs]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

Why is that?

So anyone suicidal deserves abuse is what you're suggesting is ok?

No, that is certainly not what I'm suggesting. But , hey I'm out. Will not try to offer any thoughts again with you..............

[slowsnake]

I like " truisms " if there is such a word, but each and everyone of us has his/her Own Cross to Bear, I know it's a Christian saying but it's also true for any race, religion or creed, just so happens that it's about a dude carrying his own burden, not letting anyone else share that burden, that's alright if you can carry it!.....but what happens if it's too much weight?...and why if someone is willing to help share that burden shouldn't they be allowed?

Well they can, and they do and it's the right thing to do, any selfless caring person will help out without being asked if they see a brother on the road carrying too much weight, no matter what the reason!
That's how life is, some have an easy ride, others harder and a few even harder still!
There is no easy way through life, there's only " your way " or the way that suits you and your personal nature, everyone needs help sometime in their lives, take what suits you and disregard what doesn't.

But, learn to relax, its bloody hard to learn too, it comes to dole bludgers in bucket loads, but being a worker is hard going, juggling your life around a weekly pay packet, and in hard times like we have now, we'll that's when it all comes together, all those experiences good or bad are setting you up for this point in your life, right here, right now!

Can't add much more except keep on plugging away, always forward, never look back at what could of been, that's gone, vanished into nothingness, a non existent problem that seems like a mountain, but its not, it's finished, gone into the ether like every other thought or past problem!

That's it I'm done, no more to add tonight, but don't give up, fight!...


Cheers Billy

[MercuryT]

Remember today is RUOK day.

For mine it's an extremely important day for many people.

So please reach out to those who you think might be struggling, or take some positive action if you feel you are struggling yourself.

Stay safe all.

Cheers, Merc