Depression, Anxiety

[Burnout]

I have my Camper Trailer and go bush. This last year has been harder, had to hang around as Mum was old & crook too, she died last Tuesday morning.
I had my first anxiety attack when I was seven; when told I was going 450miles away to Boarding School. Been tough, been bad, been ok too. Some friends have helped, but mostly I do for myself.

[Grega]

sorry for your loss man. nothing i can say to make it any better.
i like the idea of a camper trailer and disappearing for a while. that was the idea of my hilux v8

[BLUEYBA]

Originally Posted by Grega

Thanks BlueyBA. Don't want to imagine, my mind is busy enough and I don't want that in there pulling me down :| I try and keep it busy to keep the **** thinking at bay. Doesn't always work though.

Question : Does anyone else really crash hard when Xmas time comes around. I normally have leave around this time not by my choice and I find going from 150% consumed with work to zero messes with me in a really bad way. Xmas 2015 was very dark for me.

I think you need to fill your time with something. Like the others have said by going on a holiday and get away from it all. Do something that's for you and that you really enjoy. Maybe something where you can take your time and take things in and forget lifes pressures

[danzvtil]

Funny of this Bali talk, showing how important it is to monitor yourself and know your triggers. I was in Singapore a few months ago and went to little india. Like the real india, it is very hot and very crowded, I started to feel like crap, so left there after an hour or so. Then recently I was in bali for the first time with my family for a birthday celebration. More of the same, hot and busy with a lack of personal space which put me on edge. Then my cousin announced over brekky one morning a news story about terrorists targeting planes to Australia, and that set me off, I had to leave a day early.
So like any anxiety issue, my physical reaction was out of proportion to the actual danger, I hadn't taken any meds for 5 years and didn't take them with me .
My case is proof that knowing yourself and your triggers can help to manage anxiety and panic attacks and lessen their impact.

[Tui2]

Hi people, wow, just as i was having a bad start this morning, i turn to AFF to distract my irrational thoughts and here you all are, i suffer a severe form of Borderline Personality Disorder (a title the professionals now know is incorrect but haven't retitled), it's alot of overlapping disorders and the most debilitating would be the Bipolar overlap which really drops me hard at Christmas time. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy... google if you are down because no type or anount of medication has helped me better, in 30 odd years, more than this. Anxiety prevents me from most public situations but nothing like Christmas to isolate me as a way of protecting my family from embarrassment. Yes we must be able to recognise our triggers but how we deal with them takes time if at all we can, so avoid. WE ARE NOT ALONE

[TheSneakiness]

The biggest trigger for me as stupid as this sounds is when my son does the exact opposite of something I ask him to do within a small timeframe (lets say 3 minutes here for arguments sake)

If he either hasn't done it in that time or actually did do something but it was wrong then I tend to start flipping out, the anger and anxiety rises fairly quickly and it takes some time for me to settle myself down after the event.

[Grega]

Rapid did the same thing happen to you as a kid ; ie: did your old man have a short fuse? I know i sometimes do the same with my two but I am more mindful of it these days and have changed my ways alot. When i was a kid if i didn't do what i was told when i was told instant death x eleventy million coming my way.

[Tui2]

Originally Posted by Rapid_Axe

The biggest trigger for me as stupid as this sounds is when my son does the exact opposite of something I ask him to do within a small timeframe (lets say 3 minutes here for arguments sake)

If he either hasn't done it in that time or actually did do something but it was wrong then I tend to start flipping out, the anger and anxiety rises fairly quickly and it takes some time for me to settle myself down after the event.

A subject very close to me as i am divorced from my first wife and recently separated from fiancé of 8years, in both scenarios there were kids involved, my son and then step grandkids. Until the latter i had no real idea the affect of my disorder was having on, not just the kids, but me. So now being aware allows me some space (not always) to catch my thoughts before reacting in a way that i know i will punish myself for, for days. To better mental health is to be realistic in your goals and take baby steps, I'm at a stage after MANY YEARS where i now apologise pretty much instantly and explain why dad/pop reacted in that manner. And aslo explain my disorder at first meet and ask friends n family to please bear with me at least while i am trying. Communicate with the kids and see if they will help you help them.

[snopony]

Originally Posted by Rapid_Axe

The biggest trigger for me as stupid as this sounds is when my son does the exact opposite of something I ask him to do within a small timeframe (lets say 3 minutes here for arguments sake)

If he either hasn't done it in that time or actually did do something but it was wrong then I tend to start flipping out, the anger and anxiety rises fairly quickly and it takes some time for me to settle myself down after the event.

Theres a very good saying that Ive heard many times in discussions about mental health, because of the varying nature of different mental issues, anxieties and what not- and underlying causes/triggers/ and peoples varying personalities and how things affect different types of people in different ways.... often people do have a problem...and they cope quite well, and function quite normally and it dosn't really affect the quality of their life, their work or the people close to them such as family and friends... Its when whatever is wrong (and I hesitate to use the word wrong here) with them starts to have an impact and affect the people around them that it starts to become a problem. And thats when things need to be addressed.
Not knowing the childs age here, there are things such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and mindfulness, that when practiced really really help in that sort of situation.
All kids, unless you have the fortune to have a complete angel of a child, at some stage, prob more frequently than not are going to test you till you are taken to the borders of insanity and back, but with a few small practiced changes, you can teach your brain to go "meh, kids" and ignore it. (as long as whatever they are doing dosnt involve potentially injuring themselves, other people /kids/or property.
Worth looking into.

[supershifty]

My trigger for anxiety is crowds - like major shopping centres and especially trying out "new" experiences, I'm a complete bundle of mess when I go for job interviews - vomiting out of the ute door. I go to car shows or the drags and although there is a crowd there, I don't get anxious cos we're all there for the same thing - sounds crazy I know.

I manage the shopping centre anxiety by ordering home delivery where I can, if I have to "go out" I pick a quiet time usually on a Monday at opening time.

I'm on escalitopram to help manage my disorder, drug doesn't stop it but certainly takes the edge off things.

What has definitely helped me is surrounding myself with great and genuine people and getting rid of the ******* parasites. For those that are caring people make all the difference.

Cheers!

[BLUEYBA]

Originally Posted by supershifty

My trigger for anxiety is crowds - like major shopping centres and especially trying out "new" experiences, I'm a complete bundle of mess when I go for job interviews - vomiting out of the ute door. I go to car shows or the drags and although there is a crowd there, I don't get anxious cos we're all there for the same thing - sounds crazy I know.

I manage the shopping centre anxiety by ordering home delivery where I can, if I have to "go out" I pick a quiet time usually on a Monday at opening time.

I'm on escalitopram to help manage my disorder, drug doesn't stop it but certainly takes the edge off things.

What has definitely helped me is surrounding myself with great and genuine people and getting rid of the ******* parasites. For those that are caring people make all the difference.

Cheers!

Just a suggestion. Have you thought of slowly, small steps of challenging the anxiety. So only going to a small shopping centre for 10mins at a time and then increasing it. Also having a plan to deal with the anxiety should it start. I know it difficult as I have it as well and it controlled me for so long and still tries to but 99% of the time I control it now. Congnitive behaviour therapy really does work and help as I have been through it. It won't happen straight away, it takes time to learn and retrain your mind but its worth it

[Tui2]

Most people (meaning blokes) dont want to talk about 'IT', especially emotional matters concerning mental health, i suffered and continue to fight with, as a child ADHD evolving into Adult ADHD and final diagnosis Borderline Personality Disorder. The oddest thing about my disorder is that i can council but very rarely can i take heed of my own advice. Anyone that needs a Faceless Friend to talk 'shop', are quite welcome to email me.

[Madaya]

After having a good stint doing house sitting, I find myself living back with the folks. Some might think its a good thing, but it is stressful watching old age creep up, being forgetful, eating the wrong stuff, not sleeping well - and that's just me.
But seriously, the scenario is pretty tough. I figure I'm a glass half full guy, my folks glass is pretty much empty and I here the same old stuff everyday.
I help out where I can, in fact if I wasn't around they would be in a bad way. Health issues, neither can drive. I've spent more time in hospitals and doctors in the last 3 months than I have in my entire adult life.
Ah well. Another doctors appointment this afternoon.

[mechanic]

Exercise is my solution to this problem.
I'm 66, tried GP's, Psych's, medication, medication + alcohol, hypnotists etc etc.
I now do 30 - 40 mins of weights/day [ or as often as I can ] then bike for about an hour to an hour and a half.

Tried fishing, boating, shooting and for me it comes back to lifting some weights and doing some cardio to make a difference.
Really do have to put that time aside for yourself regardless of whatever is going on.
Just my 2c

[BENT_8]

I had a melt down recently, i wont go into the trigger but i'll share my coping method with you guys.

Last saturday afternoon my best mate and i took off for a 4 night stay at Victor Harbor on SA's Fleurieu Peninsula for a bit of R&R and a paddle.
Home was my Camper trailer set up at the beachfront caravan park in Victor.

We set up home and grabbed some KFC for tea before settling into a few of Jim Beams best.
The following day was a bit blowy so after our customary bacon and egg sunday breakfast we took off for a stroll around Granite Island before a serve of local caught fish and chips at a local eatery.
That night we knocked up a quick BBQ and packed for a paddle up the Coorong the next morning, Jim Beam again was called upon to helped settle the mood.

Monday morning was about as good as it gets, a forecast of 29, a southerly breeze of 8 knots and the sheltered waters of the Coorong to explore for the first time.
We left the beacon 19 boat ramp at 7am and paddled towards the mouth of the mighty Murray river taking in all the sights and birdlife along the way, tranquility is an understatement.
I've always wanted to get closer to this part of the world and this was a great opportunity.
Despite its natural beauty, the shrine to a bloke called 'COCKY' was sobering enough to remind you this is one of the most treacherous pieces of water on the entire coastline of our great country.
Standing there on the edge of the channel flowing at full tilt it came across me that if i took 2 steps forward the complications of life could be over in seconds, such is the thin line between coping and giving up.

The paddle home was good thinking time, i needed that.

We got some rain the following day, 40mm in 4 hours and 3" running through the annex, oh well, at least i know its waterproof, if it absorbed that lot it would survive anything SA weather can muster up.

We packed on Wednesday morning and made our way home stinking of Jim Beam and salt water, but most importantly with a clear mind.

A few pics to share...

[Tui2]

Originally Posted by Madaya

After having a good stint doing house sitting, I find myself living back with the folks. Some might think its a good thing, but it is stressful watching old age creep up, being forgetful, eating the wrong stuff, not sleeping well - and that's just me.
But seriously, the scenario is pretty tough. I figure I'm a glass half full guy, my folks glass is pretty much empty and I here the same old stuff everyday.
I help out where I can, in fact if I wasn't around they would be in a bad way. Health issues, neither can drive. I've spent more time in hospitals and doctors in the last 3 months than I have in my entire adult life.
Ah well. Another doctors appointment this afternoon.

After a failed marriage and recent loss of the love of my life, fiancé of 8 years, due to my disorder being too much for some to cope with, i am back hom3 and caring for my parents both in their mid 80s, and believe me I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE COMING FROM, but it also is the only thing i feel I have left in me that is good and righteous, even though they have and once again are, suffering my disorder, i now am suffering their deteriorating livelihoods. Oh and how loud do their TV'S NEED TO BE?!! I coms home and They have one TV each in their bedrooms, plus the lounge room all on the same channel with half a second delay between them! All loud and as one repeats the other. Arghhhhh!

[OzriderXR8]

There is a cliché in the motorcycle world about never seeing a bike parked outside a psychiatrists office.

I ride one every day into the city and there is nothing better to clear the mind.

We all have moments of anxiety when we have those oh sh$t moments, or when things just don't seem to be getting anywhere. The advise I've been given from friends who have lived it is basically 'If you can't shake it off, talk to someone, a mate, a stranger, a professional. Doesn't matter who, just talk to someone.'

It's amazing to me that many of the issues that I have thought over the years were unique to me and everyone else wouldn't understand are generally so common it's almost laughable.

[Tui2]

Originally Posted by OzriderXR8

There is a cliché in the motorcycle world about never seeing a bike parked outside a psychiatrists office.

I ride one every day into the city and there is nothing better to clear the mind.

We all have moments of anxiety when we have those oh sh$t moments, or when things just don't seem to be getting anywhere. The advise I've been given from friends who have lived it is basically 'If you can't shake it off, talk to someone, a mate, a stranger, a professional. Doesn't matter who, just talk to someone.'

It's amazing to me that many of the issues that I have thought over the years were unique to me and everyone else wouldn't understand are generally so common it's almost laughable.

personally can't see how I would contemplate a laugh towards depression, some anxieties can seem laughable and some too contrived to be real, but when a certain part of the brain is damaged (especially by abuse in all its variables) there is no way of knowing what, who, why, when or how/if someone is going to better themselves with any or all the types of therapies, i know this for a fact because i thought i was well too many times for my own liking. Although i attempted checking out twice in the last 20 years i knew i wanted to keep trying to achieve some sort of progress and it came in many ways but never to recovery. Keep talking but its no laughing matter

[Grega]

I ride one every day into the city and there is nothing better to clear the mind.

i think this is whats missing from my life.

....have also been told the same about talking to someone about it. for me, it doesn't help, the burden still remains, i carry it like a ball and chain.

its days like today where i really fail to see the point in carrying on. what the **** for. so over it.

[BLUEYBA]

Originally Posted by Grega

i think this is whats missing from my life.

....have also been told the same about talking to someone about it. for me, it doesn't help, the burden still remains, i carry it like a ball and chain.

its days like today where i really fail to see the point in carrying on. what the **** for. so over it.

You need to learn to release the burden and not hold onto it. By taking to the professionals they will show you ways of letting go and dealing with the burden. They teach you how to recognise things and deal with them before they get out of control

[Tui2]

That's the only reason (not love of/from a family member or fact of responsibility ) i am still here, psychology and especially psychiatry now the nail has finally been hit on the head when it came to the correct medication and acceptance of who i am and how to cope with accepting that it might not get much better than this but know in yourself that you are trying to do your best and talking to others (like a Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Group) does help if ya can just get ya arz...back side there. Anyway enough talk about talk, just get out there and talk

[SYZ]

Hi fellas...

I've just noticed this thread, and thought I'd let you know of my situation re depression etc. I was first diagnosed around 17 years ago—largely as a result of unrealistic/unfair workplace conditions—with clinical depression, generalised anxiety disorder, and hyper-vigilance.

The hyper-vigilance manifests itself in several ways; for example, if I hear a car door slam outside, I must check it out; if I hear voices in the street at night, again I have to check it out; if the neighbours are having a BBQ I'm constantly monitoring the sound levels of their (quite acceptable) music; I can't relax on New Year's eve waiting for the inevitable fireworks to go off; etc. I also have an annoyingly overactive startle response to perceived sudden or threatening stimuli.

These conditions are now superficially controlled with medication—Lexapro and Xanax—but over that period I've succumbed to a condition known as Non-24 Hour Sleep Wake Syndrome.

Over time, this N-24 syndrome had the effect of making me virtually unemployable, as my sleep cycle is pushed back by around 4 hours every day, giving me a rolling circadian cycle period of approximately 28 hours.

Now that I'm retired, this doesn't affect me from an employment perspective, but it sure plays merry hell with my social life—or what's left of it. If someone phones me (Tuesday) and invites me to a BBQ next Saturday, I have to say maybe yes, maybe no; I'll have to let you know Friday night... sorry. Recently for example, I had to miss two of my nephews' weddings.

My main ongoing issue right now is a total, unconditional lack of personal motivation. Making my bed is an effort; having a shower is hard work; mowing the lawn is impossible; visiting the library takes advance planning; driving from south Gippsland to visit family in Melbourne or Wodonga never happens; etc etc etc.

I've found psychiatrists—all 4 of 'em—useless as an ashtray on a Harley. Psychologists only marginally more helpful, which is really damning with faint praise. I haven't wasted any more time seeing head doctors for a couple of years now, and my GP is more than happy to monitor and prescribe my meds.

I've undergone a clinical sleep study with no negative results, other than getting virtually nil REM sleep phase (lower gamma activity). This is a known precursor for depression. I'm typing this at around 2AM, having got out of bed at 6PM last night. I'll probably head off to bed around 10AM today... or midday... or 2PM... or?

I can, and do, totally empathise with the other blokes who've told us their stories here, and I appreciate reading them, as it confirms "we" are ultimately not alone.

—And my apologies if I've been a bit long-winded!

[Tui2]

Welcome to SYZ, to the fordforums nutter thread, where we can be real men haha. I have as you may have read, BPD which is an overlapping disorder and i sympathise with you and the the sleep hours or lack there of, but most of all (as wrong as this sounds) i am so relieved to hear of another 'socially overprotective' (i call it this because of how i justify not going to family bbqs etc, is to save or protect loved ones from, at the least, embarrassment of my actions WHEN something pulls one of my many triggers. I'm reaching my 50th year and suffered from a 5 yo with a screw loose, and if I didn't end up with the responsibility of caring for my elderly parents, and that also now that my son is grown up, i not so sure I'd be here, simply due to enough is enough, it drags out eh? Anyway I'm here for a chat anytime and i mean try anytime. PM or eail through the site in need.

[1TUFFUTE]

Originally Posted by raised by monkeys

No. Long onset of low mood, depression, is a chemical imbalance. Its the reduction in serotonin received by receptors in the brain. Anti depressants, sri and ssri's (serotonin reuptake inhibitors and selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors) only trick other receptors in the brain to receiving serotonin. This is a bandaid fix.

Forgive me for not reading the whole thread but I thought I'd make a contribution in case it helps.
On the topic above....Serotonin(your brains happy drug)......there is a natural liquid called "5HTP" that acts like an antidepressant! Half my wife's family now use it and boy o boy does it work....it's what your body uses(an amino acid) naturally to make Serotonin which is basically the happy chemicals in your brain.
Any natural therapist can get this for anyone. Let your body help and fix itself!

Has anyone ever looked at the side effects of today's prescription depression drugs terrible terrible terrible. Most would be better off without that junk(no judgement tho)

[Ford_The_Win]

Originally Posted by 1TUFFUTE

Forgive me for not reading the whole thread but I thought I'd make a contribution in case it helps.
On the topic above....Serotonin(your brains happy drug)......there is a natural liquid called "5HTP" that acts like an antidepressant! Half my wife's family now use it and boy o boy does it work....it's what your body uses(an amino acid) naturally to make Serotonin which is basically the happy chemicals in your brain.
Any natural therapist can get this for anyone. Let your body help and fix itself!

Has anyone ever looked at the side effects of today's prescription depression drugs terrible terrible terrible. Most would be better off without that junk(no judgement tho)

St. John's Wort is also a great natural alternative, I recommend it to all my clients who can't or don't want to go down the pharmaceutical pathway. It's very affordable, with a bottle that will last about a month costing $10-$15 from the chemist. A small number of studies have suggested it is even more effective than synthetic antidepressants - the jury is still out on that one I think, but it's effective enough that you shouldn't take it whilst also taking synthetic antidepressants.

[1TUFFUTE]

Ok so I feel a tad guilty of not respecting the thread by commenting and not reading everyone's thoughts. So I read them, and feel compelled to man up and spread my story.....something that to me is rather depressing, emotional and until I read this thread....didn't think there was anyone who would care to hear! But it seems I'm a pussy ;) so here goes!

I have an extensive background in junior, schoolboy and non professional sports after school. Ranging from ANYTHING I could rap my hands or spikes around.so basically I was very very active! Anyway....started a career as a Carpenter and eventually a builder. About 10years in.....I start getting these nerve issues in my hip area.(never been injured, only a few fractured fingers). Overtime it progresses to my groin,back and legs, getting worse over time! 5ish years later I've scaled back so much I'm off the tools.....so I start my own renovating buissiness to stretch it out another year or so.
So here I am now on disability, with my lovely childhood sweet heart wife of over 10years, now as my full time carer.
The latest (basic version)and by far the mostsucsessfull diagnosis has come up with "pudendal neuralgia". Basically damaged nerve that leads to the groin. Now here's the fun part.
My pain can be described as chronic persistent pain to the groin area (including and by FAR the worst the testicles) A few specialists encouraged me to describe to others who required a description, too liken it to well over a few normal child births worth of pain every time! Often sharp hot needle like shots directly in the worst possible place for a male. These burst of pain go from all over my groin to my hips and down my legs to the knee! "During" these bouts I clearly admit to being capable of shooting myself, the pain being so great! (I stress I'm am in no way suicidal normally). They can last from 5mins up to over an hour and I generally get at least one event a day!
After the "event" (I'll call it that) the tenderness and touchiness is extreme, so much that even the lightest of touches from even light pants is unbearable!
For these reasons I also never sleep well as the onset is sudden an viscous and can be anytime, no particular movements seem to bring it on.....I can be dead asleep or totally comfy and BAM! Sad face!
On top of this I have an extreme tolerance too pain meds....so relief is minor. For those in the know....stupid amounts of Tramadol, Valium and Lyrica. Endep for sleep.
I therefore spend my life trying to do things I enjoy, to keep my mind occupied! I watch a lot of sport,read and play video games a fair bit! I do physio,vegetable gardening and look after chickens!
Being in extreme pain effects your brain in unconcevable ways.....especially when your body is perfectly healthy and fit. Being physically disabled and being a sports freak do not go well together! I feel for every person on this planet who is depressed or suffers from anxiety as it is not natural, and unless you have a great support network, it can be unbelievably hard to get thru life!

There are 3 things (short version again)that keep me sane.....
My religious beliefs(won't get into that of course)
My amazing workaholic little wife
And my DOG. Rico is a Bullarab/Ridgeback and is attached to my hip. He is my shadow more then you could imagine! Getting a pet is the number 1thing from my personal experience that I'd suggest to others to get to keep them involved,busy and loved an so on! Sorry I'm not the greatest with words!

Not sure if I got that all across right but I gave it a crack guys.
Stick in there boys n girls....get a hobby n enjoy life

[superyob]

Thanks for that 1Tuffute...

[TheSneakiness]

Originally Posted by Ford_The_Win

St. John's Wort is also a great natural alternative, I recommend it to all my clients who can't or don't want to go down the pharmaceutical pathway. It's very affordable, with a bottle that will last about a month costing $10-$15 from the chemist. A small number of studies have suggested it is even more effective than synthetic antidepressants - the jury is still out on that one I think, but it's effective enough that you shouldn't take it whilst also taking synthetic antidepressants.

Very interesting... will do some research about St Johns Wort and hell if it makes me feel good then why not?

[Ross 1]

I have given St. Johns Wort a try and found it worked, for me though I found Chill Pill by Cenovis worked better. One a day and if you have a stressful day ahead 2. They take about 45 minutes to kick in and if you take them long term even less.

http://www.chemistwarehouse.com.au/b...ort-60-Tablets

[TheSneakiness]

Originally Posted by Ross 1

I have given St. Johns Wort a try and found it worked, for me though I found Chill Pill by Cenovis worked better. One a day and if you have a stressful day ahead 2. They take about 45 minutes to kick in and if you take them long term even less.

http://www.chemistwarehouse.com.au/b...ort-60-Tablets

Lol I actually saw that in Coles one day and had to laugh, unfortunately they were sold out.