Santa Facts !!!!

[csv8]

No known species of reindeer can fly. But there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not completely rule out flying reindeer, which only Santa has ever seen.
There are 2 billion children in the world (persons under 18). But since Santa doesn't (appear to) handle Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, or Buddhist children, that reduces the workload by 85% of the total--leaving 378 million according to the Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there is at least one good child per house.
Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household, a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding, etc. That means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, at tops 25-30 miles per hour.
The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming each child gets nothing more then a medium sized LEGO set (2 lbs), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting the "flying reindeer" can pull TEN TIMES that normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine--we need 214,200 reindeer. This increased the payload--not even counting the weight of the sleigh--to 353,430 tons. Again for comparison, this is four times the weight of the HMS Queen Elizabeth.
353,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. This will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecrafts re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy per second, each. In short, they will burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and creating a deafening sonic boom in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa meanwhile, will be subject to centrifugal forces of 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250 lb. Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by a 4,315,015 pound force. In conclusion, if Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas eve, he's now dead.

[Doogstar]

What are trying to say? Santa doesn't exist? might as well tear up the letter I just wrote him. :(

Everyone knows that Santa uses magic, either that or he can bend space and time and operate outside the laws of physics. Bah humbug.

[The Monty]

This should have ****Possible Spoilers inside**** in the title.

[fmc351]

Im dyslexic, I sold my soul to Santa

[satria]

Originally Posted by The Monty

This should have ****Possible Spoilers inside**** in the title.

LOFL

Great call.

[GXL078]

This thread is gay

[AU2PWR]

SANTA IS REAL !!

Pfft , What next , the Easter Bunny doesnt Exist either , that crazy talk !

[Timmeh]

Great thread, very funny.

Timmeh

[Feathers]

You lie.

[WizBang]

Santa is real end of story .

[badbert52]

haha funny .
nice post

[Mrs B]

Go Santa you good thing. :

[dazAUSR]

Well if Santa's dead after all that, I get to drink the booze and eat the biscuits left for him....so it will still be a merry christmas : ...by the way Santa is real ,he is just too clever for you to see him...like your thoughts though very funny.

[Scott]

But I'll still get presents right??

[Sledgehammer]

Buit I saw Santa at the Mall today

[thefargo]

next you will try and tell me politicians lie!!

[gamera]

Haha, good stuff!
Santa FTW

[TUF_302]

Originally Posted by Sledgehammer

Buit I saw Santa at the Mall today

And ive seen him 3 times at Myer in the last week!

[bjr22n_]

i saw santa 7 times, in 7 different locations... one was driving an MG, one was at Myres, one was at Harvery Norman, one was at the Marketplace, one was at the Sturt mall, one was stuck in the chimney at someones place and the other, was sitting at home watching the Ashes... (oh wait.... i think that one was dad)

[fiery]

Has anyone clicked on the 'report bad post' thing yet..????

This thread is a bad thread.. ( : ) nasty thoughts there suggesting Santa might not be real or that those wonderful flying reindeer actually don't fly...

Santa IS REAL..... :


***leaving this thread now.. not returning either...***

well not for a few moments anyways

[irsa76]

I heard that this year Santa is useing a new sleigh. Apparently this one is smaller and lighter but can be restocked on the fly. Seems we're sending half our fleet to the North Pole this week to be loaded.

[pecker73]

He has to be...

He has his own web site... :hihi:

Santa Clicky

[krt10]

old. this dosnt come up every crissie. bout the 4th time ive herd it.

[1970galaxie]

And what about the explanation about how the fat man gets down my chimney................I haven't got one, so I miss out again!

[drcook]

Originally Posted by SVO_XR6

And ive seen him 3 times at Myer in the last week!

and he collected my garbage last friday morning.

[pennybrain]

I saw Santa this morning waving at everyone as he was riding a big red Harley motorcycle down the Parkway in Canberra. He wasn't wearing a helmet either unless he has one hidden underneath his red hat! There was a helmet strapped to the back of the bike though.