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Old 14-04-2008, 10:16 PM   #1
TadKa
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Default Relationship Breakup Saviour

No one wants to hear my sob story but my girl of 7 years broke up with me on Friday. No proper reason hardly any warning. I'm absolutely shattered. The thing that has saved me the most from going completely off the ropes is being able to hop into a semi decent car I enjoy and just fanging around all weekend. Even just sitting in the car is comforting. At least if I look after her she won't just turn around and wreck me like a woman. I'm not pretending I have a fantastic car but to me its a nice place to be. Anyone else found solace in their beast at a time of need?

(Mods feel free to delete thread if its not to standard, its just the more I talk about it the more its sinks in)

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Old 14-04-2008, 10:22 PM   #2
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Yeah. That makes sense. I enjoy driving so I do it when I'm miserable, or just bored.

Sorry to hear it though. A couple of good friends of mine have just split after about the same length of time. It's not nice to hear.
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Old 14-04-2008, 10:25 PM   #3
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mine takes ages to get ready to go anywhere, is moody, takes all my money and always starts a fight where it will cause maximum embarrassment to me. sometimes i get so upset I have to park her in the shed and go spend some time with my girlfriend ;)
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Old 14-04-2008, 10:30 PM   #4
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7 year itch is alive and well. So many people break up after 7 years. Sorry to hear about your breakup but at least you have found some comfort
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Old 15-04-2008, 09:39 AM   #5
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Get a bull bar
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Old 15-04-2008, 10:07 AM   #6
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Sorry to hear about you and the missus.
I get great joy from throwin my leg over my GSX and taking it for a quick ride. Helps me clear my head and also puts a smile on my face. I try not to ride when really angry as I might not be concentrating on the riding enough...
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Old 15-04-2008, 10:25 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TadKa
No one wants to hear my sob story but my girl of 7 years broke up with me on Friday. No proper reason hardly any warning. I'm absolutely shattered. The thing that has saved me the most from going completely off the ropes is being able to hop into a semi decent car I enjoy and just fanging around all weekend. Even just sitting in the car is comforting. At least if I look after her she won't just turn around and wreck me like a woman. I'm not pretending I have a fantastic car but to me its a nice place to be. Anyone else found solace in their beast at a time of need?

(Mods feel free to delete thread if its not to standard, its just the more I talk about it the more its sinks in)
Sorry to hear about you and your missus. Must be hard after 7 years together but don't worry, you're not alone, a few of us are going through the same situation at the moment.

Can't say I've ever turned to my car in this time of need. Cadbury is usually the one to console me lol.

Krissy.
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Old 15-04-2008, 10:30 AM   #8
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I've just been through all that. Made the mistake of getting back together after 6 months apart, that was a waste of an additional three months. Obviously that didn't work out!

I found the key was exercise. I've lost heaps of weight (starting to put some back on in size) and after the gym you feel great all day.
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Old 15-04-2008, 10:32 AM   #9
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Just do whatever makes you happy!

Breaking up is very stressful, if driving your car makes you feel happy, then do it! I like driving too, going for a nice cruise in one of my cars, crank up some tunes, its a super way to pass the time.
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Old 15-04-2008, 11:40 AM   #10
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Hi Tadka - I too broke up with a girlfriend after many years….I think it was 6 or 7 years in total. Started going out when I was 17 or so. Never lived together but for a while we really tight and in our own world for a few years. When we busted up finally I was depressed and 'rudderless'. I really only had my work getting me out of bed in the morning (how sad is that?).

I enjoyed my freedom and thinking about things with a 'why not?' attitude instead of 'better not' attitude. I spent some (actually a lot of ) money on nice wine, bought an expensive push bike with all the trimmings, went driving for a week in the country just following my nose and a bunch of other things I wouldn't have done before.

I was actually just about book myself on a P&O cruise and was considering the price I had been given on a Club Car when I met Mrs Ringo….and everything changed. We were practically living together within a month.

I still regret not going on a Cruise and particularly not buying the Club Car….I need Kofie Annan from the UN to help me negotiate the Club Car at present with house reno's going on…

Whats my point?

Breaking up sucks but take the opportunity to do something or buy something that you couldn't our wouldn't have done before.

It will be good for your well being and sense of self also make you more attractive to the next lovely lady who pops up on the radar.

Also 'Solitary Man' by Neil Diamond and a bottle of expensive bottle of bourbon or red wine can also be good for your well being.

*thumps chest and salutes* - good luck brother !
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Old 15-04-2008, 11:55 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ringo

Also 'Solitary Man' by Neil Diamond and a bottle of expensive bottle of bourbon or red wine can also be good for your well being.

*thumps chest and salutes* - good luck brother !
Completely agree Ringo, Solitary Man and a Good Bourbon helped me along too

Fast Forward 2 years, I had my time to be independent- enjoy my car, get out on some cruises, do some traveling with my job...just do whatever and then came along a very special girl who I'm with at the moment..

Oh and one more word of advice...don't go looking for a new flame any time soon...just have time to yourself...Don't be the guy that looks for the right girl, be the right Guy that a girl looks for!
:

In a way- I'm happy for you...glad you didn't marry the wrong one and glad you'll get some time back to yourself....time to do some re-inventing

Welcome to the Brotherhood.

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Old 15-04-2008, 11:57 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Barry_v
mine takes ages to get ready to go anywhere, is moody, takes all my money and always starts a fight where it will cause maximum embarrassment to me. sometimes i get so upset I have to park her in the shed and go spend some time with my girlfriend ;)
I KNOW YOUR PAIN !!!
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Old 15-04-2008, 01:45 PM   #13
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Haha, thanks guys. Good advice Ringo. Yeah I've been pretty depressed. I'll be better when I move into a new place with some mates. Then I'll be keen to hit the town and see what single people get up too these days. I was a big gambler in my younger days and this girl helped me with it so I just need to avoid getting back into it.

Somethings going on these days. I have now heard of at least a dozen long term couples broken up in the last 2 weeks. Also upsetting is I know of 3 people that have had someone close to them die suddenly.

Maybe this is punishment to those of us that didn't participate in earth hour?!?!?!?!
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Old 15-04-2008, 01:57 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TadKa
Haha, thanks guys. Good advice Ringo. Yeah I've been pretty depressed. I'll be better when I move into a new place with some mates. Then I'll be keen to hit the town and see what single people get up too these days. I was a big gambler in my younger days and this girl helped me with it so I just need to avoid getting back into it.

Somethings going on these days. I have now heard of at least a dozen long term couples broken up in the last 2 weeks. Also upsetting is I know of 3 people that have had someone close to them die suddenly.

Maybe this is punishment to those of us that didn't participate in earth hour?!?!?!?!

Stay away from the vices matey.....no-one wants a broke bloke .........

plus you never know when Miss Glamour : (or her cousin Miss Goodtime : ) will make herself available for dinner & drinks!...
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Old 15-04-2008, 02:10 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TadKa
Haha, thanks guys. Good advice Ringo. Yeah I've been pretty depressed. I'll be better when I move into a new place with some mates.
You'll be right. Best to have good mates around at times like this. Truth is, I'm devastated over with my break up with RspecAU, especially since I'm 5½ months pregnant too but the amount of people that have come out to support me, especially from the forum, is helping me to get through this. Just stick with your mates, it will help.

And I think the best advice I've seen in here to you was from Bucket - "don't go looking for a new flame any time soon ... just have time to yourself"

Quote:
Originally Posted by TadKa
Maybe this is punishment to those of us that didn't participate in earth hour?!?!?!?!
Doubt it. Some of us are just born cursed lol.
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Old 15-04-2008, 02:10 PM   #16
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yea well look on the bright side buddy, she taught you a lot of things no doubt, dont forget those things and you havent wasted 7 years, you actually sort of invested them and made yourself a better person. at least it wasnt 25 years 3 kids and 2 grandkids
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Old 15-04-2008, 02:16 PM   #17
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hey buddy, im sad to hear what happened, but mate (and i completely understand this is 100000% easier said than done) try and be positive, nothing you can do about it, and no matter how much moping you want to do, it won't change a thing...

I agree with you about how the car can make you feel better (do you have a f6 like your avatar?).

but yeah, be positive, try and enjoy life and mate, think of it as a new lease on life rather than loosing someone.
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Old 15-04-2008, 02:27 PM   #18
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Quote:
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(do you have a f6 like your avatar?).
Nah just a n/a 6. thats my car though. I had a truck scratch up the bar so I wacked on a fibreglass gt bar. I think it looks good but a bit bare without an intercooler.
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Old 15-04-2008, 02:32 PM   #19
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A relationship is like a freeway. There are so many exits, the first being the next morning.
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Old 15-04-2008, 03:27 PM   #20
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My ex left me around 2 years ago now, after 8 years of Marriage, 2 kids and working 60+ hour weeks to pay off our house ...

I know it may not help you yet, but just remember that old saying as it is so very true - Time heals everything.

And yeah I also like to go for a cruise, makes me feel better if i'm ever down a bit ;)
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Old 15-04-2008, 04:53 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackLS
A relationship is like a freeway. There are so many exits, the first being the next morning.
Ever hear of wrong place, wrong time?


Good to hear that you are handling it better than some (like me) sitting around, drinking and thinking about what could have been...
When you move in with your mates it will be easier, and alot of fun.
Good luck with it.
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Old 15-04-2008, 05:03 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BA_Turbs
I've just been through all that. Made the mistake of getting back together after 6 months apart, that was a waste of an additional three months. Obviously that didn't work out!

I found the key was exercise. I've lost heaps of weight (starting to put some back on in size) and after the gym you feel great all day.
Another vote for exercise....Its like a drug...fantastic...especially in times like these
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Old 15-04-2008, 05:06 PM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by XXR6X
My ex left me around 2 years ago now, after 8 years of Marriage, 2 kids and working 60+ hour weeks to pay off our house ...

I know it may not help you yet, but just remember that old saying as it is so very true - Time heals everything.

And yeah I also like to go for a cruise, makes me feel better if i'm ever down a bit ;)

Bit like me....I had gone off cars during 12 years of marriage and having 2 kids ...However once ther marriage was over (her decision, and her loss) now full on back into them...I didn't think 18 months ago I'd be driving a GT today....I'd never heard of a B series GT until joining these forums....Its amazing how life pans out...always for the better...one door closes, another opens...You'll be fine mate
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Old 15-04-2008, 05:33 PM   #24
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mate i can sort of understand how you feel, after 4yrs my gf has told me she wants to go on a 3month "break" i have no idea why and its the last thing i want to do. However i dont think i have much choice in the matter. Hopefully i can now spend a bit more time with my car. Maybe buy a new one with all the extra cash i will save.
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Old 15-04-2008, 05:38 PM   #25
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Get yourself a cat if you get too lonley, just having a presence in the house can be soothing, and they love you and are cheap to please.
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Old 15-04-2008, 06:24 PM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yaw
Get yourself a cat if you get too lonley, just having a presence in the house can be soothing, and they love you and are cheap to please.
Sounds like the exact opposite to my ex gf..leaves me when im lonely, hates me and is awfully expensive to please! :P

haha na but mate my ex broke up with me after a 3 yr long relationship last september, and for the first 2 months i was utterly shattered, depressed and just "negged-out" - Obviously now 7 months later I'm coping a LOT better, enjoying life a LOT more and have recently come across a gorgeous girl who i get along with like a house on fire! I also have a LOT more time for myself, and more importantly..my car hehe

Stick at it buddy, don't give up and enjoy life while your free!! Everyone at FF is here for ya chief!
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Old 15-04-2008, 07:24 PM   #27
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What you need is a rebound girl!, go out with some mates, get a bit drunk, find some decent girl, get with her, and then you will feel a little better! wont heal all wounds but it does help, well it did for me lol!
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Old 15-04-2008, 10:07 PM   #28
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yes well my el futura is my enjoyment as iam a single dude, it fills all my pleasureable moments especially when i have to spend money to get it fixed
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Old 15-04-2008, 11:03 PM   #29
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Thanks for all support guys. We have a pretty good little community here on FF. I couldnt image going through a breakup with kids involved. would be really hard. I'm just wondering if I'll have commitment issues next time I get in a relationship. I wouldnt want to 'invest' in another relationship with 'miss right' only to have it end badly. I'm a fairly simple guy with relationships. My parents are my role models. I want what they have. I guess the thing is people do just change and move apart from each other. would just be nice to have some warning. Not perfect relationship one day, alone the next, no fight, no real reason.

Hopefully my mates will find a house tomorrow for us all to move into. I'm currently living in 'our' old house but she is living at her parents next door. Rather awkward.
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Old 16-04-2008, 03:12 PM   #30
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Well you had better come for a drive and to the Mini Golf with us on Sunday. It will be a good day away thinking about other things. And it's a good chance to get back in the car again!
Hope to see you there.
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