Speedbumps, coming to a freeway near you!

[Franco Cozzo]

So, from the incredibly smart "Stephen Conroy" who thought of the genious internet filter, comes speed bumps on ALL AUSTRALIAN FREEWAYS! Oh, how it will save the children! I always have to dodge little children playing on the Calder or Hume highway! /sarcasm.

http://digihub.smh.com.au/node/1484

Conroy plans speed humps for Australia's freeways

aturner | December 18, 2009

In an ambitious plan to protect Australia's children, Communications Minister Stephen Conroy has announced plans to install speed humps every 100 metres on all Australian freeways.

After a 12 month trial of speed humps in several suburban back streets, Senator Conroy says he is confident that placing speed humps on every Australian freeway will reduce accidents by 100 percent with a "negligible" impact on traffic congestion and travel times.

"Australia's roads are a dangerous place for children, so the Rudd government is doing everything it can to protect people," says Senator Conroy. "A vocal minority of drivers may object to the plan, but the moral majority can see that it's the right thing to do. Anyone who objects to the mandatory speed hump plan obviously hates children".

Senator Conroy also released a traffic management report which appears to support his claims of reducing accidents by 100 percent with a "negligible" impact on traffic congestion. Unfortunately the report was only conducted in suburban back streets. The report concedes that once mandatory speed humps are applied to 100 kph freeways, one in five accidents will still occur. The report also concedes that dangerous drivers who are most likely to speed will easily find ways around the speed humps.

The wording of the mandatory speed hump plan leaves scope for it to be expanded beyond the freeways, although there are few details available. Senator Conroy claims the plan will only be applied to areas which have been "refused classification". Supporters of the speed hump plan have already called for it to be expanded to include roads outside casinos, gay bars, adult book stores and some medical clinics.

Traffic management specialists, transport groups, car manufacturers, road builders and motoring associations have all condemned the mandatory speed hump plan as flawed, unworkable, easily bypassed, politically motivated and open to abuse.

Senator Conroy's heart may be in the right place, but he clearly has "no understanding of how roads work," says Australian Motoring Association spokeswoman Shirley Knott.

"The mandatory speed hump plan will strangle the road network for the entire country, while doing little to stop people who are doing the wrong thing. Rather than waste millions of dollars on a project that will cripple our transport system while not actually achieving its goals, we recommend the government listen to the traffic management specialists and invest the money in education campaigns and better policing," says Ms Knott.

"Of more concern than traffic jams is that the mandatory speed hump plan is veiled in secrecy and open to abuse. Who is to say how future governments may manipulate traffic management to block off streets that it doesn't want the public to see? An open and transparent road system is a cornerstone of democracy, and we don't want to see Australia sliding down the slippery slope towards a police state where the government controls everywhere we go and everything we see."

For more details of opposition to the mandatory speed hump plan, visit nocleanfeed.com.

I don't know about you guys, but going from 100km/h to 20km/h in 100 meters with other traffic doing the same, scares the absolute crap out of me. Its bad enough when you get people jump on the brakes when speed camera is coming up.

[|||]

uh...

the blog post is sarcasm...

[snappy]

Anyone who objects to the mandatory speed hump plan obviously hates children".

With educated comments like this how could he be wrong

[Franco Cozzo]

Whoops, my sarcasm detector is faulty.

[iliov]

Is this some kind of joke??

[Falcon Coupe]

The man is an idiot, the lunatics are in charge of the asylum in this country.

[nugget378]

Originally Posted by Falcon Coupe

The man is an idiot, the lunatics are in charge of the asylum in this country.

You'll be right on the Berg mate...I may have to get one myself if this insanity gets up. :P

[T3ts50]

Surely this not not serious.

[|||]

Originally Posted by T3ts50

Surely this not not serious.

of course its not.

it's a sarcastic blog post point out how stupid the filter is by replacing the internet with a physical highway. its an allegory




sigh

[BPXR6T]

or an analogy even

[|||]

Originally Posted by BPXR6T

or an analogy even

actually you're right. its too obvious too be an allegory on another reading

[djjase]

What about our beloved animals? What are they doing to stop the road kills?

Driving back from Orange there was at least 10 kangaroos, 1 lamb, 2 birds and a cat that was left on the road

Maybe they should put in some crossings for them too or maybe instead of the Kangaroo signs for next 20km make it a 40 zone

[The G6ET Spot]

Originally Posted by XCPWSF

Anyone who objects to the mandatory speed hump plan obviously hates children".

The only thing we hate is idiotic politicians.

Oh wait a minute, that puts them all in the same basket:

[4Vman]

This is surely a joke...

[nugget378]

Originally Posted by 4Vman

This is surely a joke...

I can see the headlines now,
"criminals are switching to 4wd getaway vehicles, the HWP has put in an urgent order for pajero's"

[Eu-GenixX]

the thing i hate about politicians is when they try to cram their own personal beliefs down our throats instead of what is good for the nation.. "This is what i want.. not what is best for all"

[djjase]

lol looks like the ute will need a 10" lift kit now instead of been lowered

[4Vman]

Originally Posted by nugget378

I can see the headlines now,
"criminals are switching to 4wd getaway vehicles, the HWP has put in an urgent order for pajero's"

hey im buying a pedders franchise if this comes in..

Far out, i think we'd get a real giggle if we saw every proposal that gets thrown around parliament... they probably have dozens of these hair brain ideas dismissed every week.

[djjase]

will u give 10% discount on a lift kit for the ute

[GasoLane]

Well it wont affect me. 90% of my driving is on the Newell Hwy and speed humps have been standard on its entire length there for years!

[RATT]

It's not April fools is it?

[cs123]

Originally Posted by RATT

It's not April fools is it?

No, as mentioned earlier it is a **** take.

Conroy is the communication minister who is trying to introduce filtering to "Save the children".

[pauljh74]

Originally Posted by Falcon Coupe

The man is an idiot, the lunatics are in charge of the asylum in this country.

Or one of my favourites - this is a circus, the problem is the clowns are running the show

[4dlvr]

i want what this guy is smoking

[FGX-351]

This is why I voted for Johnny. :(

[sgt_doofey]

As it's been stated in previous posts, it's a humorous post outlaying in different terms what the Government's mandatory internet filter will do for the internet.
Just visit http://nocleanfeed.com

[Fev]

Just re-read some posts before realising that it was a joke

[irlewy86]

Internet filtering, a 2 foot, 600m $89 million, Rabbit proof fence.

[ltd_on20s]

well, it's about time that all the car clubs got together and funded an independant to run in the name of all motorists.

wonder how many votes he would get......

who's willing to chip in some cash?

[bdave351]

Love it, wont someone think of the baby cars!